[Intro: H. Jon Benjamin]
Everything's gonna be ok
(phew) Everything is gonna be ok

[Chorus: H. John Benjamin]
Bad stuff happens in the bathroom
I'm just glad that it happens in a vacuum
Can't let them see me with my pants down
Coasters Magazine is gonna be my big chance now
But I'll be outta here in no time
I'll be doing interviews and feeling just fine
Today is gonna be a great day
I'll do Coasters Magazine and blow everyone away

[Verse: Kristen Schaal]
Let's be clear, I did absolutely nothing wrong
I'm not to blame, it's not my fault
This is just to say, if, Gene had pooped like every day this would've all just blown away
But he'll be outta there in no time
No-ones gonna blame me, I'll be doing just fine
Today is gonna be a great day
If Teddy can't unstick my dad I'll find another way

[Bridge: Jay Johnston & Larry Murphy] [Video Only]
Where's Bob? I wanna tell em I can smell em from across the street (laughs)
Yeah Linda where is Bob? I gotta do his hair for the big interview
Interview? What interview?
Bob's got a big magazine interview
What are they writing an article on guys with mustache's you wanna punch? (zoom! ha, ha!)
I say zoom now, you like it?
Eh it's Ok

[Chorus: H. John Benjamin & Kristen Schaal]
Bad stuff happens in the bathroom (Let's be clear, I did absolutely nothing wrong)
I'm just glad that it happens in a vacuum (I'm not to blame, it's not my fault)
Can't let them see me with my pants down (This is just to say, if, Gene had pooped like every day this would've all just blown away)
Coasters Magazine is gonna be my big chance now (would've all just blown away)
But I'll be outta here in no time (But he'll be outta there in no time)
I'll be doing interviews and feeling just fine (No-ones gonna blame me, I'll be doing just fine)
Today is gonna be a great day (Today is gonna be a great day)
I'll do Coasters Magazine and blow everyone away (If Teddy can't unstick my dad I'll find another way)

[Outro: H. John Benjamin, Kristen Schaal, & Bobs Burgers Cast] [Video Only]
Bad stuff happens in the bathroom (Let's be clear, I did absolutely nothing wrong)
I'm just glad that it happens in a vacuum (I'm not to blame, it's not my fault)
Can't let them see me with my pants down (This is just to say, if, Gene had pooped like every day this would've all just blown away)
Coasters Magazine is gonna be my big chance now (would've all just blown away)
But I'll be outta here in no time (But he'll be outta there in no time)
I'll be doing interviews and feeling just fine (No-ones gonna blame me, I'll be doing just fine)
Today is gonna be a great day (Today is gonna be a great day)
I'll do Coasters Magazine and blow everyone away (If Teddy can't unstick my dad I'll find another way)