[Verse 1: Carnies]
Some lucky ducks get all the luck
Some break their backs to make a buck
And sure, we are a bunch of shady
Criminal-ish gents and ladies
But we did our time (Yeah)
We paid for our crimes (Well, most of us)
And our misdemeanors
Now we sell fried dough and weiners
Even though we're kinda sketchy gals and fellas
Doesn't mean that Fischoeder can go and kill us (Uh-uh)
Working here can really be a roller coaster (Hup)
One day, you're clеaning vomit, next, you're on a missing poster

[Chorus: Carnies]
It's such a drag to havе a boss
Who pays you bad (Who pays us bad) then bumps you off
Some lucky ducks get all the luck (Oh, yes, they do)
But that's not us (No, sir), unlucky schmucks (Sing it)
It really stinks, it really sucks
So we'll just play our lucky ducks

[Interlude: Tina, Gene]
Cool, have fun with that
Should we get going?
[Verse 2: Louise, Gene, Carnie]
Some lucky ducks get all the luck (No)
You've said your piece, now listen up
To me, your life, it seems just fine
You think that's bad? Try being nine
The other day, things got real crazy
A girl at school called me a baby (What?)
Yeah
Even though I'm small, well, I can tell you for sure
I'm gonna be the one that solves this frickin' murder
I know you all think Fischoeder's the one who did it
But I will find the evidence to get him acquitted

[Chorus: Louise, Carnies]
I'm just a kid (It's such a drag)
That's what they say (To have a boss)
"Now run along" (Who pays you bad)
"Now go and play" (Then bumps you off)
Some lucky ducks (It really stinks)
Get all the luck (It really sucks)
Until I show (So we'll just play)
Them what is what (Our lucky ducks)

[Post-Chorus: Louise]
I'm gonna show them all what I can do
Gonna show 'em I'm much braver than what
You think that I am even though I'm small
No matter whatever, gonna show you all
[Outro: Louise, Tina]
Come on, we don't need their help
Have a nice day!