[Verse 1]
She smoked 100s when I met her
She tried to quit before she left me
I'm not so sure if that's important
Free association gets me dizzy
They ask, "What's the reason for your appointment?"
I try to come up with something vague
She asks if I'm going to the party
I tell her I'm going to the party

[Verse 2]
It's so hot by noon, I just get queasy
It's so hot by two, I stay inside
I try to put down a cup of coffee
He asks how much I'm drinking, and I lie
But doctors are always trying to tell you
Some torturous way to live your life
It's not like they know everything ever
Hey, man, I went to college, too, ooh, ooh

[Guitar Solo]

[Verse 3]
But all of the kids I met on campus
Are settled down beside the sea
Some days, I wish that I could be that
Sometimes, I forget to spit out the seeds
I'll make it through this if it kills me
Then, when it kills me, I'll come back
Jesus will make me a disciple
Or maybe he'll let me be your cat
[Verse 4]
I wait to be led into temptation
As I lay a load across the street
Catherine is smoking pot above me
Watching Hellraiser on TV
Tomorrow, I'm driving to Chicago
Tonight, I am kneeling from the pew
Still doing all I can to understand
One more erotic nightmare about you