[WHIZZER]
Hang up all your clothes

[MARVIN]
Whizzer begs

[WHIZZER]
Whizzer knows

[MARVIN]
Shave your legs

[WHIZZER]
Make me sick

[MARVIN]
You're a prick

[WHIZZER]
God you're impossible
We've been together for nine months

[MARVIN]
Ten months

[WHIZZER]
Nine months
[MARVIN]
Ten months

[WHIZZER]
Nine months

[MARVIN]
Ten months
We are the salt of the bourgeoisie

[WHIZZER]
While I put the steak in

[MARVIN]
I bring home the bacon

[BOTH]
And we're proud to say we love it how we

[MARVIN, WHIZZER]
Don't (Won't)

[WHIZZER, spoken]
Won't.​

[MARVIN, spoken]
Don't.​
[WHIZZER, spoken]
Won't.​

[MARVIN, spoken]
Don't.​

[BOTH]
Agree

[WHIZZER]
Everything he owns is vile
Marvin doesn't care a whit
Marvin doesn't share
My devotion to
Style

Men from France can cancel a debt
Men in cufflinks make me forget my name
I intend to upset
This regrettable game

[MARVIN]
Whizzer takes me by the neck

[WHIZZER]
What is this, wash and wear?
[MARVIN]
Whizzer has unlimited knowledge of
Dreck

[WHIZZER]
Send me flowers

[MARVIN]
Mention is made

[WHIZZER]
Make them roses

[MARVIN]
Attention is paid
In full

[WHIZZER]
See how quickly he sours

[MARVIN]
When he pushes, I pull

[WHIZZER]
Hang up your clothes, Marvin
Breeding shows, Marvin

[MARVIN]
I was rich
He was horny

[WHIZZER]
We fit like a glove

[MARVIN]
Close your eyes, Whizzer

[WHIZZER]
Passion dies
But I'd kill for that thrill of first
Love

[BOTH]
We ask for passion at all times
We stand to passion and drink this toast

[WHIZZER]
Still it's awfully trying

[MARVIN]
And we're not denying

[BOTH]
That of all the lesser passions
We like fighting most

[WHIZZER]
Nyah!

[MARVIN]
Whizzer screws too much to see
What a joy's monogamy
What a joy is saving his joys
For one man

[WHIZZER]
Leave me

[MARVIN]
Love me

[WHIZZER]
Ha, don't be a fool

[MARVIN]
Want me

[WHIZZER]
Feed me

[MARVIN]
No one's so cruel
And cheap

[WHIZZER]
What I love I devour

[MARVIN]
What you love you devour
What I covet I keep

Isn't that right, Whizzer?
Let's both fight, Whizzer!

[WHIZZER]
I was trained in karate

[MARVIN]
I'm best when I cheat
So I'll cheat, Whizzer, and I'll shove
And I'll kill for that thrill of first
Love

[WHIZZER]
We've been together for nine months

[MARVIN]
Ten months

[WHIZZER]
Nine months

[MARVIN, spoken]
We've been together for ten months!

[WHIZZER]
Nine months

[MARVIN]
Ten months

[BOTH]
In fact we've almost survived a year

[WHIZZER]
True, but who is counting?

[BOTH]
We're too busy mounting
A display of our affection
That is so sincere

[30 measure interlude]

[BOTH]
Passion dies
Passion dies!

[WHIZZER, MARVIN]
I would kill for that thrill (I would kill for that thrill)
Of first love (Of first love)
I would kill for that thrill (I would kill for that thrill)
Of first love

[BOTH]
I would kill for that thrill of first
Love
Love
Love!