[SISTER CHANTELLE (as the Virgin Mary), spoken]
Stop!
[PETER, spoken]
Fuck me, Matt! It's Diana Ross
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Uh, sure enough, ain't. But now I know I got the right person.
[PETER]
What's that supposed to mean?
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Listen up, Peter. I may be a virgin but I ain't new to the game. Don't be frontin' with Mary.
[PETER, spoken]
Holy shit!
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
[KYRA & TANYA (as angels/backup singers)]
Think it over
[PETER]
Hail Mary, full of grace
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Stop, stop, stop! Do you know how tired I am of that prayer?
What do you know about 2,000 years, and they still be saying the same prayer?
[KYRA & TANYA]
Change is comin', it's comin'
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
I have a message for you, Peter.
[KYRA & TANYA]
Listen closely
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Now where'd I put it? All these pockets...Oh yeah, here it is.
[KYRA & TANYA]
Seek and ye shall find
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
"You will know the truth and the truth shall..." Who writes this stuff?
[KYRA & TANYA]
Too generic
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Never mind, I'm gonna wing it.
[TANYA]
Mary loves her puns
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Yes I do. Now, I saw what you just did.
[KYRA & TANYA]
Mary saw you
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Seems the love that dare not speak its name done gone ahead and spoke
[KYRA & TANYA]
Now the secret's out
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
You tell one person, that's it. Cat's out of the bag.
[KYRA & TANYA]
Will he keep it?
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
There's a phone call that is now overdue to your mother, baby.
[KYRA & TANYA]
Time to call her up
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Get him mama's line
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Heaven knows it's time
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Can you put him through?
[KYRA, TANYA & SISTER CHANTELLE]
Someone's got a job to do
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Mama loves you, boy
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
You're your mama's joy
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Get the doing done
[KYRA, TANYA & SISTER CHANTELLE]
Reach out, baby, touch someone
911! Emergency! It's time to be a grown up
We done gone and made the call
But you need to pick the phone up
Ring your mother, tell it all
Just go ahead and own up
Stop your lying, drop the drama
Tell the world but first tell mama
Let her know
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
I've read the books, Peter
[KYRA & TANYA]
Oprah picked 'em
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Sayin' "Come out when you're ready," but don't talk about it - be about it
[KYRA & TANYA]
Come on, come on out, boy
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
'Cause life is now, sugar
[KYRA & TANYA]
Gotta live your life
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Don't hide it under a bushel...or whatever my baby used to say
[KYRA & TANYA]
Jesus knows what's up
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Help a boy connect
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Let him call collect
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Won't you put him through?
[KYRA, TANYA & SISTER CHANTELLE]
Someone's got a job to do
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Got the change in hand
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Time to take a stand
[KYRA & TANYA]
Operator
[SISTER CHANTELLE]
Get the doing done
[KYRA, TANYA & SISTER CHANTELLE]
Reach out, baby! Touch someone
911! Emergency! It's time to be a grown up
We done gone and made the call
But you need to pick the phone up
Ring your mother, tell it all
Just go ahead and own up
Mop your mess up, drop the drama
Tell the world, but first tell mama
911! Emergency! Life is full of choices
But baby, here's the 411: with truth the world rejoices
Let it out, let mama in
Boy, you need to hear our voices
Stop the secrets, drop the drama
Roll it out but first tell mama
Let her know
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
That's it. God bless.
[PETER, spoken]
But what if God--
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Uh-uh! No questions. This isn't "Conversations with Mary"
[KYRA & TANYA]
It ain't that book, baby
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Look, you'll figure it out. And I'm on the tightest of schedules. Work, work, work, save, save, save. So many in need. But does the head of the first family lift a wing to help? No! Joseph be tellin' me, "I let you ride the donkey all the way to Bethlehem." Now that was 2,000 years ago, okay? I'm talkin' about what has he done for me lately?
[KYRA & TANYA, spoken]
(unintelligible ranting)
[TANYA, spoken]
...but it ain't the greatest story ever told if you gon' tell it every five minutes
[KYRA, spoken]
And she’ll still be talkin' 'bout "why the wise men didn't bring me nothing?"-- oh, hey, hello.
[SISTER CHANTELLE, spoken]
Keep it up! Just keep it up, and I know two ladies 'bout to be touched by an angel. You got that? We out! Peter, remember
[KYRA, TANYA & SISTER CHANTELLE]
911! Emergency! It's time to be a grown up
We done gone and made the call
But you need to pick the phone up
Ring your mother, tell it all
Just go ahead and own up
Stop your lying, drop the drama
Tell the world but first tell mama
Let her know
