West:verse 1
I'm coming off the acropolis to start some pandemonium
Don't bring limo raps to a pimp slap symposium
The mad gadfly philosophy was my invention
Rolling wit the flyest nihilist and me their French henchman
We've got the wisdom and the wit that even I couldn't question
Dropping western medicine on these East infections
It's evident you've never been our type of mental brethren
We're better thinkers better speakers better thinkers better men

Western+Eastern:hook
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win

East:verse 2
This type of arrogance is sure to be expected
From men who speak of wisdom with no clue of no respect is
You Westerners are sloppy needing discipline in life
You lack control of yourselves and of the mic
While we use precise strikes to disrupt your concentration
Hand you an ass weapon that our descendants will honor for generations
We filled a nation with patience and the presence for a living
And you'll never hold a candle to the wisdom we've written
Western+Eastern:hook
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win

West:verse 3
Oh I'll give you something you can bow and kowtow to
When I squat down and squeeze out a Tao of pooh on Lao Tzu
You need to take control of the life you're given
They call me Ubermench cuz I'm so driven
And I'm a free-thinker so confronting conformists like you it's my job
Got a sharp wit like a spit that'll skewer like a Confushish-kebab
You flubbed the mission of beating your submissive ass into submission
Dishing out more disses than pamphlets and letters and plays I've been publishing
Now that we've covered the two Yin and Yang twins I can move on to Jackie Chan
Sun Tzu I'll be picking apart your Wu with my method man
This seminal general isn't so tough in the mic
All your men must be like yo what happened
Your pitifully lyrically lucky for history you didn't author the art of rapping

Western+Eastern:hook
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
East:verse 4
Bitch I wrote the Art of War so you better get your guns out
These white boys getting burned cuz guess what now the Sun's out
Asians spitting sick but no this isn't SARS
Laozi kick the beat now Confucius drop some bars
Let me be candide with you Voltaire
French drip wi the egg noodle hair
Your ego's so distracting
Free speech doesn't mean just keep yapping
And you killed God so I gotta ask
Did he die of shame when he made your mustache
You tried to plant a new German pysche
But you just grew hate me no third Reichy
And it all starts with you you're the father Socrates
Honestly I think you owe both of your students here an apology

Western+Eastern:hook
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
Western:verse 5
I wouldn't exactly call myself a student of this plebe
Don't make Nietzsche come over and put a knee up in your chi
Cuz I'm N-I-E-T-Z-S-C-H-E
And I'll end any motherfucker like my name in the spelling bee
Plebe bitch I'm toxic like a hemlock sip
Hang a sandal on the door cuz you can suck Soc's dick
Sacre blue Socrates you're making things a little tense
Come let's blind these Chinese heines with some shiny bright enlightenment
I will not be taught comradery
From a frog who rigged the lottery
You make a mockery of ethics so keep your fat nose in your coffee
Let me be frank
Don't start beef with the Frank
Who hangs with B. Franks
Giving ladies beef franks

Western+Eastern:hook
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Western Eastern
Who will win

East:verse 6
I have turned them on themselves their chaos is our opportunity
We must remember a bowl is most useful when it is empty
Ugh Laozi I don't mean no disrespect
But you need to fill your bowl with some shit that makes some sense
Oh you don't wanna stand in the path of Lao Tzu today
I'll make you move bitch get out the way
Yo where in the tradition
Of rap battles is it written
That two dudes on the same team should squabble like some clucking chickens
Man Confucius you always try to put something in its place
Why don't you tell your eyebrows they need to fit better on your face
Oh I see you wanna make it like that
I'll smack that warmongering head out of your to-go box hat
So here's the real golden rule I weigh above you weak rookies
Confucius say you can all hold these fortune cookies