Woody Pond
Dude, Where’s My Car?
[Intro]
My name is Woody Pond
And I am a below average rapper
[Verse 1]
One question
Are you or are you not The Don?
Call me when the cops are gone
Took a strip of acid
Found more sass in me than octagons
Then I dressed like Sherlock Holmes
And went to Comic-Con
To solve the case of the missing chicken parmesan
My guess is it's Vader
I'll blow some holes in some craters
Explore the pussy in some waiters
[?]
Rollin' papers with painters, and players
Passin' to strangers
And neighbors do favors for rangers in danger
Let's take [?] for the [?]
Or the Lakers
They both suck to me
Last time that Bazooka was out
That sorority didn't fuck with me
I'm not crying or complaining
I'm just saying societies [?]
I'm that loopy loser with Lucy Lu's Vodka mixed
In my juicy juice
[?]
Suck like my shoes on Juicy Fruit
Woah my brain just hit a loopty loop
It's all good
Every drink I drink is on the fucking house like Snoopy Doo
Yeah
Woah
I just realized I've been staring at the same tapestry
For 20 minutes
I'm tripping on Mescaline
And I just realized I've been dreaming of the same pretty catastrophe
She's in my visions but she's indifferent
And I'm an insistent pothead
And a hothead
I'm not dead, and I'm not Ted
If you're not Feds then you've got bread
And that's why I bred
If I ever snitch or be a rat, then I'mma drop dead
Bet I'll finally get a girlfriend when I drop bed
Like Young Money I'mma rock beds
If she stops head
I might pop left
Well that's exaggerating
It's the Backwoods Kings
A Foxgang in a foxhole
We bake it out like a pothole
Burnin' blunts dark like charcoal
Break the Jolly Roger on a flagpole
Put your body in a manhole
If you starting acting froggy like fucking grownup tadpole
[?] quit those asshole
And I'm runnin' real racks the three little rascals
Just seize the castle
And spinnin' [?]
Flip that Yay Yo like my tassel
I left a bowl in my time capsule
So in fifty years when I wanna get baked and fuck your granddaughter
I'll dig it up
And pack it tight
Before I kill the pussy
Manslaughter
Bitch