10 Reasons I Could Never Leave

One
I found you first
You were mine before anyone wanted you
You were mine before the growth & the grooming & I've made you into what you are
You don't deserve to leave me

Two
Someone once told me to never make a home out of someone who doesn't love me
But I am a refugee & at night I need saving & in the morning I have 4 month pregnant cravings for a love that only we make
By the afternoon I get homesick

Three
We said silent vows as we stared in each others eyes & struggled through the sand just to jump in the ocean so we could feel a wave
So strong, neither one of us had the strength to pull out of
You're stuck with me

Four
Remember that night when we were so drunk we poured our hearts into one another? as if they were so full with lust that
Love began to tip over
You never really could sing but your lips created a symphony
One of the best I've ever heard
That night you said you were ready
Despite all my fears of full commitment
That night I made a birthmark
Out of you
I pressed you against my skin, delicately, yet
You became permanent
I remember you said you needed me
Five
You taught me things about life, and me
That I'm not sure I'll ever truly believe without you like
How to love myself and how worthy I am and how deep I can get before I ever let love inside of me
And how sometimes it's okay to collapse
Sometimes it's okay to relapse
Sometimes it's okay to miss everything you once were
And sometimes it's ok to dip in the past but
Only if you're ready to be the beautiful tragedy
I'm ready to be the beautiful tragedy

Six
Some nights I bleed over you
I write our story until I get so tired that my wrist won't continue moving
I haven't reached the ending

Seven
My body has a habit of waiting up for you

Eight
We hold hands tighter then an infant holds his mother

Nine
I've mesmerized the melody between your every heart beat just so I could sing it back if you ever get lonely
I learned the gaps between your fingers just in case you ever need a hand
I made sure mine fit perfectly
Ten
You promised we'd grow old together