[Verse 1]
I remember when I first set
Foot in that nightclub & laid eyes on you
I was with my buddy Jeff (not a military guy)
Still the buffest guy in Honolulu
Things were going usual—he did a line of coke
And found another woman, left me on my own
So I walked up to the bar all alone. And the bar
Tender said, “Hey Alonso, how’s it going?”
I was interrupted by a tone sweeter than Mama’s papayas
Back at home: “Alonso, huh? I’m Maria,” you said
You extended your hand just to ask for a dance
“Are you Latina?” “No, I’m filipina.” A single blink was
All it took find you in my bed sheets, breaths
Heavier than lead sheets, fingers on my—
“Jesus”, I was thinking, I could feel the seamen
Sailing in my stormy stomach singing:

[Hook]
(If your mother)
If your mother knew
How you spent your Friday nights
She would surely grab a knife
And she’d find her way to you
(If your mother)
If your mother knew
How you spent your Friday nights
She would surely grab a knife
And she’d find her way to you

[Verse 2]
I remember when I first set
My foot into our spotted beagle’s fragile ribcage
We were newly married in a studio apartment;
You had forgotten to put the dog in his cage
When I opened the door after three weeks in the fields
And I saw the living room floor sleek with his half-eaten meals
I let that puppy have it. I kicked him to the astral plane
He broke right through the ceiling squealing louder than a cabaret
Poor thing didn’t even see it coming. Didn’t know that we were gunning
For each other. Things we weren’t discussing with each other:
Like you always clubbing with my money in your clutch and
Letters in your pockets from some other lover
I had used to say that if I caught you sleeping with another man
I’d toss you off the deep end. Once I knew it was happening
I told myself I was imagining shit
“Jesus”, I was thinking, I could feel the seamen
Sailing in my stormy stomach singing:

[Hook]
(If your mother)
If your mother knew
How you spent your Friday nights
She would surely grab a knife
And she’d find her way to you
(If your mother)
If your mother knew
How you spent your Friday nights
She would surely grab a knife
And she’d find her way to you

[Outro]
“Ya no me escribes cheques
Porque no me quieres
No quiero ser merce-
Naria pero el dinero—dámelo
Si no me entiendes
Mijo lee un diccionario

“Ya no me escribes cheques
Porque no me quieres
No quiero ser merce-
Naria pero el dinero—dámelo
Si no me entiendes
Mijo lee un diccionario.”