TRANSCRIPTION NOT YET FINISHED
Part I: Fuck EPs
Alright, I fucking hate EPs. I-I hate like, this weird fucking, like, middle-ground, like, "Oh, it's not a single, well, it is a single, but like, it's fucking, like, it's an EP. It's not an album. It's an EP." Like, fuck this weird short shit. Like, fucking, maybe a couple remixes nobody wants to hear. Fuck that. Fuck that gay shit. I want a fucking al...Or just give me a normal single, not this fucking EP, like, like "Hey guys my new EP is out!" Fuck you!
Part II: Pervert
Yeah... basically, alright. When a girl gets a vibrator it's seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when I order a 240 Volt FuckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6-speed pulsating vagina, elasticized anus with a non-drip semen collection tray, together with an optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, I'm called a pervert
Part III: DAMN
So I was taking a walk the other day... And I see a man... His name is Rick James... And, I'm like "Hey, gimme some ganja..." And he says "Oh yes, I'll give you some ganja..." He takes off his pants... And I seen a leaf... And I seen a 14 inch stem... I take off my pants... And I say it once more... "Gimme some ganja..." As he inserted it... I felt it... I said... DAMN
Part IV
You know, fucking, all this fucking shit. Might wanna pucking put my music on Spotify, iTunes, fucking Tidal... (Pffft) And, motherfuckin', motherfuckin', I gotta fill in the time so it's not listed as an EP. Oh hold on, so the audio clip is like recording, but there's some blank space and another audio clip. I don't even know what this is but, alright I'm gonna let this next clip play
Part V: The Zollo Ranch
I have a story to share, about the Zollo Ranch. The dimensions of my asshole measure very differently from three years ago to present. My butthole remains still in constant pain every single lingering hour and I want to prevent other people from falling into the Zollo Trap, like I foolishly did. I can still remember his tall, bread-loaf hair towering over me in the bathroom stall. He pushed me against the wall and unzipped his pants, saying "This is way better than Tomasetti's room, right?". I was about to retort, but then, out of nowhere, his throbbing 14" erection sprung out of his Twenty One Pilots undies. It was at that moment that I knew I had made a big mistake using a school toilet. The Zollo forced me onto my hands and knees, still holding his cock, and attempted to stuff it all in my rectum. His penis was dry as a bone and couldn't fit so he tried another time. This time it worked! It slowly slid through my anus, tearing every thread of my ass until I bled. The Zollo didn't care though, he only thought of it as a good lube to use. He then started... the pumping. Oh, that awful pumping that made a squishy sound that has burrowed into my brain. I was lucky though because it only lasted five minutes before he finished in the toilet. And ever since that day my butthole has remained in constant pain every single lingering hour and I want to prevent other people from falling into this Zollo Trap, like I foolishly did. Since that moment, I've had plenty of time to think and reflect on how he planned out his meticulous attack. It all makes sense, like, he would occasionally give me looks or tightly grab on my shoulder or thigh. It all led up to this moment. He's a mastermind. Taking little small steps that would seem meaningless to a normal person and using them to his advantage. He makes you think he's your friend but what you really are is an animal on his ranch. An object that grows up eating grass and loving life until the fateful day... until the fateful day you're killed, or in his case raped. Just remember, to always keep a watchful eye folks as to not to be herded into the Zollo Ranch
Part VI: All Star
Alright so I don't know what else to put on here to fill the time gap so this isn't labeled as an EP and instead is labeled as an album, compilation album, mixtape... I don't really give a fuck what this is. Um, but, alright so I'm gonna sing a cover of Smash Mouth - All Star now in order to fill the time, in order to fill the time gap because I don't want this to be classified as an EP because fuck EPs. EPs are terrible
[Verse 1]
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead
[Pre-Chorus]
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do, so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the backstreets?
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow
[Chorus]
Hey now, you're an All Star get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a Rock Star get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold
[Verse 2]
It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now but wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture
The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire, how about yours?
That's the way I like it and I never get bored, mm
[Chorus]
Hey now, you're an All Star get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a Rock Star get the show on, pitch change
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold
[Mouth trumpet]
[Chorus]
Hey now, you're an All Star get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a Rock Star get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold
My name Jeff?
Part VII
A lot of people ask me, when are you going back to school?
And, you know, when are you going back to school?
If you know what I'm saying...
Part VIII
Yo dude, I'm fucking spooked. I'm fucking spooked, alright? So, in this next little audio segment here that I recorded, the audio just goes complete apeshit halfway through. Alright so, you know, just keep listening. Keep listening. My name Jeff dude... Ha! Ya!
Part IX
Alright, before the closing act here on this little track on this little storytime conscious track, we got a little final act here, but I'd just like to say, why the actual fuck
