How does a redhead, shorty, and sporty
Mormon girl from out west outbest the rest of the contestants;
Dance a little groove and make a move straight through an IV to my heart
Resisting her in vain right from the start?

The five brother wife and mother, man what a mother
Got a lot further by working like none other
By being a fun lover, by weathering all weather
By thirty-four, she's markedly modest yet self-assured

And every day she braves to venture selfless in service of A.,
No easy deed, his batteries never run low
Inside, she may long for some peace, serenity, though
She's a mother, 'fore she naps he gotta practice the piano

And if a tantrum ensues, and the antics come in slews
Our bundle o' joy can mount volcanic 'ruptions of abuse, she'll
Take a page out of her playbook, ask "What mom trick can I use?
Lest someone get contused, I gotta get this bomb defused."

More than a dozen years ago, I said
"This chick is insane, man!
Running ev'ry day, concussions, asthma, all just be damned
An Ivy education, sincere, selfless all the same?
This girl's gonna take my name
What's her name, man?"

Intrepid Redhead Jennifer
She's my Intrepid Redhead Jennifer
And there's a million reasons I love her
Can't overstate, just how great...

One autumn day her skull got jarred, seeing stars on
The frisbee field of play, I walked her home
I brought her meals on trays
Poor babe, non-stop I cozied up, her frosh pup

(whispering)
Then J-Gard got better but her guard would not drop

Memorized her schedule, which bred, you'll likely realize
More ventures, my intents were well-disguised
I faked real surprise at chance meetings:
"Golly gee, fancy seeing you here!"
Then fin'lly Hallow's Eve, though callow
We flee all our doubts and fears...
I would'n' have tried so hard to woo
A gal less smart or true, I was
Petrified in part, but my heart knew
My bride she'd be, forsooth, check us
Just reading, eating, and traveling, never apart
At libraries and dining halls and Broadway shows and Central Park

Leavin' for our missions now a Yale goodbye two years just fly
Cleavin' back together, in New Haven, and the lullaby
That falls from my heart, as I ask for her hand:
How could there be a happier man?

How could there be a happier man?
Can't overstate

How could there be a happier man?
Can't overstate

How could there be a happier man?

How could there--- ???
(Could there---???)

I can't overstate!!!

Intrepid Redhead Jennifer
(Intrepid Redhead Jennifer)
My heart beats true for you
(My heart beats true for you)

You never let me down
Forever pushing me to climb

Oh, Intrepid Redhead Jennifer
(Intrepid Redhead Jennifer)

When my mind turns to you
Rush of dopamine floods my brain
Luscious melodies flow like rain
My world will never be the same, oh

Hear her speak Romanian
Or Swedish, even Russian

Running mara- or tria- thlons
She ain't afraid of nothin'

Perform a piece, prepare a feast
Damn sexy -- now she's blushin'!

First, I fancied her
Then, entranced by her
Then, advanced on her
Then, romanced her
How can it be? I'm the damn fool that got her?

There's a million reasons I love her
I can't overstate!

And what’s her name, man?

Intrepid Redhead Jennifer!

[Spoken by Jennifer at the Yale Carillon in Harkness Tower]

Hi! We're now at the real carillon. And as you can see, it is quite different from any other instrument you've seen. It's got wooden batons you play with your hands and wooden batons you play with your feet!

[Outro: carillon music]