John Bolton
The Press Conference
[REPORTERS - GROUP 1]
Has she been living far or near?

[REPORTERS - GROUP 2]
What kind of letter did she send?

[SOLO REPORTER, spoken]
Excuse me, over here!

[REPORTERS]
The rumors never end!

[REPORTERS - GROUP 1]
You've had imposters, is it true?

[REPORTERS - GROUP 2]
What sort of proof do you intend?

[SOLO REPORTER, spoken]
Excuse me, over here!

[REPORTERS]
The rumors never end!

[LILY, spoken]
Good afternoon. I am the Countess Lily Malevsky-Malevitch. And this is Count Vladimir Popov.
[VLAD, spoken]
P-o-p-o-v!

[LILY]
The Dowager is coming
But she's running very late.
I'm certain that her majesty
Will set the record straight.
But royalty is royalty.
One always has to wait—

Wait, wait!

I'm really not at liberty
To gossip with the press!
Her majesty is coming
And till then you'll have to guess!

[VLAD]
Suffice to say you'll meet today
The little lost princess!

[MALE REPORTERS 1 AND 5]
Did she arrive by train?

[MALE REPORTER 2]
I heard she may have gone insane!
[LILY, spoken]
A lie!

[MALE REPORTER 3]
I'm from the Paris news—
We do exclusive interviews.

[VLAD, spoken]
Oh my!

[MALE REPORTER 4]
Is she a fake or is she real?

[FEMALE REPORTER 1]
How does she look?

[FEMALE REPORTER 2]
How does she feel?

[FEMALE REPORTERS 3 AND 4]
What has she done?
Where has she been?

[FEMALE REPORTERS]
How did she live?
Who took her in?
[LILY]
We're nearly ready to begin[GROUP 1]
Where has she been?
What has she done?


We're waiting
Eagerly to see

[ALL]
The Princess Anastasia...[GROUP 2]


Who took her in?
Is she the one?


Is she[SOPRANOS]
The rumor



The legend

The mystery[LILY]
Anastasia!

[VLAD, spoken]
Lily![LILY]
Enough! Now...
Her majesty is elderly
And doesn't suffer fools

She's ready to receive you
But you must obey the rules.

No smoking and no joking.[REPORTERS]


She doesn't suffer fools


We must obey the rules.[VLAD]
And no handling of jewels.

[LILY]
(spoken) Members of the press
This way!
This way![REPORTERS]
Where has she been?
What has she done?
Who took her in?
Is she the one?

We're waiting
Eagerly to see[SOPRANOS]
The rumor


The legend

The mystery[ALL REPORTERS]
The Princess Anastasia!