[Intro]
Hi, my name's Shane Dawson
I'm a famous YouTuber with lots of fans and lots of money
And those two things make me very happy
Honest
If you wanna be a famous YouTuber like me just follow these steps
Here we go

[Pre-Chorus]
If you wanna be a famous YouTube star
I've got lots of tips
If you wanna be a famous YouTube star
Just listen to this
Go to college for filmmaking
Take a class on creative writing
And don't forget your business master's degree
Haha, just kidding

[Chorus]
Cause all you need
Is to Facetune all your selfies (look like a cartoon)
And act like you're eighteen even though you're really thirty-three
And make lots of money
Selling literally everything because one day
You'll be nothing
[Verse 1]
If you wanna be a famous YouTube star
Exploit your relationship (babe, get over here)
Make sure all your video thumbnails are you and the girl you're with
And even if you're fighting every day
Pretend like your love life is going great
Tag all your pics with #relationshipgoals

[Interlude 1: Shane and Shane's girlfriend]
I think we should break up
Okay!

[Verse 2]
I'll get a million views on our breakup vid (i'm so sad)
I wish I had some kids
So I could force them to do challenges (eat it)
I want a health crisis
So I can vlog the recovery process
Oh no, I'm dying!
Just kidding, only on the inside
Refresh your social media page all day and all night
You never have to go outside
I haven't showered for like thirty days
It doesn't matter because everyone that cares about me's behind a screen

[Interlude 2: Shane and fans]
Hi, friends!
Hi, Shane!
Without you guys, I'd be literally nothing!
*connection lost*
*gasp* Oh no, I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later
Good thing I prepared for this
*grabs bleach*
*connected*
Wow, that was close, haha!
[Verse 3]
Make sure that all your tweets
Are about all your business meetings (I'm actually just going to Chipotle)
Vlog the entire day
Even when you're out driving
And last but not least
Make sure you have a plan B for your life
Cause soon no one will be watching (nope)
No one will be watching

[Outro]
Hahaha, well, there you guys go!
Hope you enjoyed the tips!
And make sure to hit that like button
Cause every like is another day that I don't guzzle down this bleach and cause a slow, painful death, hahaha
Bye