I'm a dog shit ashtray
I'm a shrugging mustache, wearing a Speedo tuxedo
I'm a movie with no plot, written in the backseat of a piss-powered taxi
I'm an imperial armpit, sweating Chianti
I'm a toilet with no seat, flushing tradition down
I'm socialist lingerie, I'm diplomatic techno
I'm gay pastry and racist cappuccino
I'm an army on holiday in a guillotine museum
I'm a painting made of hair on a nudist beach eating McDonald's
I'm a novel far too long
I'm a sentimental song
I'm a yellow tooth waltzing with wraparound shades on
Who am I?
I am Europe