[Verse 1: Darwin Deez]
I hope that the last page
Of your eight-hundred page novel is missing
I hope that it rains
If you leave the window down on your red Mustang

[Chorus]
'Cause every day ought to be a bad day for you
'Cause every day ought to be a bad day for you

[Verse 2]
If you drop your keys
I hope there's a sewer somewhere very nearby
I hope that your team lost
I hope your new girl takes off with a new guy

[Chorus]
'Cause every day ought to be a bad day for you
'Cause every day ought to be a bad day for you

[Bridge]
And I would like to be your girlfriend
So I could dump you
And I would like to be your garbage man
So I would never have to pick up your trash again

[Verse 3]
Maybe you should wonder
Why your apartment is always so empty
Well I hope you get locked out
Of that apartment and have to call Jenny (Ohhh!)

[Chorus]
'Cause every day ought to be a bad day for you
Every day ought to be a bad day for you
Every day ought to be a bad day for you
'Cause every day ought to be a bad day for you

[Outro]
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
But I'm sorry if it ever is, I'm sorry if it ever is
I'm sorry if it ever is