[Intro]
This is a crab, this- this, has sex with kids
A pedophile would be really nonplussed
If you opened your mouth and that noise came out

[Chorus]
This is a crab
This has sex with kids
This is a crab
This has sex with kids
This is a crab
This has sex with kids
This is a crab
This, this
This is a crab
This has sex with kids
This is a crab
This has sex with kids
This is a crab
This has sex with kids
This is a crab
This, this


You are a pedophile
You are a nonce
You are a perv
You're a slot badger
You're a two pin din plug
You're a bush dodger
You're a small bean regarder
You're a unabummer
You're a nut administrator
You're a bent ref
You're The Crazy World of Arthur Brown
You're a fence vole
You're a free willy
You're a chimney bottler
You're a bunty man
You're a shrub rocketeer
[Hook]
You know
You've just mentioned some of the names that
We have to put up with every day
And it's just another form of racism

[Outro]
When you have children of your own, you'll remember Uncle Beesey
And get 'em to undress by the window, would you do that for me?