Andy Milonakis
Arrogant American Freestyle (Remix)
[Intro]
Throw your hands up
Throw your hands up

[Verse 1: RiFF RAFF]
Let the pad Thai glisten, the Kirby Puckett thunder kitchen
I'm serving fresh fucking parking lot Winn Dixie
I poured the melted hockey puck into the Dixie cup
Jump out the Heathcliff truck and then I hiccup
Yeah, the Benz seat belt hotter than a patty melt
I spoke vivid vocabulary words to make sure I was felt
They didn't feel me
Frostbite touch my earring
I wouldn't let you near me
Fall back, you hard of hearing?!
I rock-I rock the stormtrooper shades just to evade you wastes of space
Just so you don't invade my mental drapes
Just to ensure that we don't make eye contact
Ask me to tag you in a photograph and I won't call you back
What has art came to? When random dudes...
Think invisible clout in a digital console
Can blur the lines of unparalleled realms and abstract gold
I wouldn't even let you watch me paper fold, you might taint my soul
I hate to use the word hate but I hate to procrastinate
I hate I had to elevate just to further separate from you cakes and fakes
You sponge soft heathen, don't have no business breathing
I made forty grand last weekend, I was sleeveless
While you was sleeping ask your granny where the grilled cheese is
I pray for the Lord's burberry blessings and resurrection
While you're scrolling through the Instagram comment section
Yeah I valet park the Coupe in Kuwait, I left the roof down for vape
FN on my waist
Yeah khaki commando, the Lambo on my lap
Who the fuck is RiFF RAFF? Yeah I'm cocky when I rap
You should go to Planet Fitness 'cause you're tacky and you're fat
Your grey Hanes shirt sweat stain on the back
Mom pats your back and laughs when you running laps
Bought the burberry Bentley for the Prada parking space
You ain't worth minimum wage, I can see it in your face
RiFF
[Verse 2: Dirt Nasty]
Yeah baby
You can hear the piano, I'm Tony Soprano
And I'm not like Rambo when I'm wearing the camoflauge
It's a mirage, butt fuck you in the garage
Underwater flows are magic
SCUBA stands for self-contained underwater breathing apparatus
Doing ayahuasca with merlins
I opened up the Persian curtains, it's a whirlwind
Me and Donald Trump disagree on a lot of stuff
But we seem to get along at the taco truck
He was telling me some awful stories
I'm like "Bitch, pass the guacamole"
Uno, dos, three, six, I was never good at arithmetics
Me and RiFF RaFF taking acid trips
And we're coming to your town, hide your chicks
Pedal to the metal in the Pontiac Buick Civic
Lucid dreams, eternal pre-teens, who you kiddin?
Single man, I single handedly diminish
Dolly Parton, my French braids I ain't finished
Stalactite go right in the glory hole
Looking like a unicorn from Borneo
On the Maury Show, I had the episode
5-MeO-DMT down in Mexico
My whole life been a series of bad decisions
Now I just pet dogs and laugh with children
At the strip club, I'm alone in the corner
I paid $300 bucks just to get a boner
Crying tears of Almond Joy, she smells like cocoa butter
Doing coke in a stolen Toyota Tundra
I read books on drugs, yeah, I'm learning, man
I fly a UFO right into Burning Man
I want deep intellectual conversations
You on Instagram looking at your notifications
Weak humans, you all need stimulation
I meditate naked on a lake in Jamaica
I quit weed so I could analyze my wet dreams
Life ain't always what it seems
It ain't always what it seems, nope
It ain't always what it... uh-uh
[Verse 3: Andy Milonakis]
Eating wakame salad with Joaquin Phoenix
Delusions of grandeur is the number one weakness
I was the joker on Jimmy Kimmel Live
Just a fat white rapper that looked five
I'm a cool mother trucker, I fucked your mom at Rutgers
You could go blow your pops, he a sucker
At the Oakland taco truck (Gay Area)
Three Loco back? That's a gray area
The three of us are perfect like Eminem and Dido
Fresher than the snow crabs deep in Hokkaido
This song is hella long but it don't need a chorus
Your raps are like a Russian name, they Boris
Eating Borscht in my Porsche, I know it's Porsche of course
A horse is a horse now I'm dating myself
Strange addictions, now I'm dating my shelf
I think we should abolish eating nail polish
To them it's like a plate of fries that I demolish
You're overrated like Popeye's chicken sandwich
I heard your SoundCloud and I just can't stand it
You peep my shit, you wanna stan it
Lil Erf motherfucker, bitch, I'm a planet
Fuck Hollywood, it's a bunch of pretending
Like the people that were happy with Game of Thrones ending
The spoilers on my whips, whitty quips on my lips
Loose lips sink ships, your mom sank the Titanic
My fanbase is gigantic, I never planned it
I got vintage bars like a T-Mobile sidekick
Your raps gonna suck, I don't need to be psychic
You act hard online and I'm like haha
You're softer than a virgin piña colada
Doing shows in Japan, I get Kyoto checks
I'll get you my pretty and Toto's next
My life's going good like wings in blue cheese
Can I get another order for my crew, please?
If Riff Raff orders ranch I'm putting ants in his pants
Smoking plants with my fans staring at a Rembrandt
I'm the hardest artist, I spray painted the TARDIS
Got stabbed in London and my dick sucked in Cardiff
Went to Amsterdam with a half a plan
Nutted quick at the red light, felt like half a man, uh
But I still came though