[Intro: Satan]
Well, I'll tell you what
Maybe we'll have ourselves a little Christmas right here
C'mon everybody, gather 'round

[Verse 1: Satan]
String up the lights and light up the tree
We're gonna make some revelry
Spirits are high, so I can tell
It's Christmas time in hell
Demons are nicer as you pass them by
There's lots of demon toys to buy
The snow is falling and all is well
It's Christmas time in hell

[Chorus: Satan]
There goes Jeffrey Dahmer
With a festive Christmas ham
After he has sex with it
He'll eat up all he can
And there goes John F. Kennedy
Carolling with his son
Reunited for the holidays
God bless us, everyone

[Verse 2: Satan]
Everybody has a happy glow
Let's dance in blood and pretend it's snow
Even Mao Zedong is under the spell
It's Christmas time in hell
[Bridge: Satan & Adolf Hitler]
Adolf, here's a present for you
Oh, Ein Tannenbaum
Yes, Ein Tannenbaum

[Verse 3: Satan]
God cast me down from heaven's door
To rule in hell forever more
But now I'm kinda glad that I fell
'Cause it's Christmas time in hell
Here's a rack to hang the stockings on
We still have to shop for Genghis Khan
Michael Landon's hair looks swell
It's Christmas time in hell

[Chorus: Satan]
There's Princess Diana
Holding burning mistletoe
Over poor Gene Siskel's head
Just watch his weenie grow
For one day we all stop burning
And the flames are not so thick
All the screaming and the torture stops
As we wait for old Saint Nick

[Verse 4: Satan]
So, string up the lights and light up the tree
We're damned for all eternity
But for just one day, all is well
It's Christmas time in hell
Get a toast together and make it quick
We've gotta make room for Andy Dick
Wake his mother and ring the bell
[Outro: Satan]
It's Christmas time
(Christmas time, Christmas time, Christmas time)
Christmas time
(Christmas time, Christmas time, Christmas time)
It's Christmas time in hell
Merry Christmas, movie house