[WILBUR]
Styles keep a changin'
The world's rearrangin'
But Edna, you're timeless to me

Hemlines are shorter
A beer costs a quarter
But time cannot take what comes free

You're like a stinky old cheese, babe
Just gettin' riper with age
You're like a fatal disease, babe
And there's no cure, so let this fever rage

Some folks can't stand it, say time is a bandit
But I take the opposite view
Cause when I need a lift, time brings a gift
Another day with you

A twist or a waltz
Is all the same schmaltz
With just a change in the scenery
You'll never be old hat
That's that!
You're timeless to me

[EDNA]
Oh, Wilbur!

Fads keep a-fadin', Castro's invading!
But Wilbur, you're timeless to me
Hairdos are higher, mine feels like barbed wire
But you say I'm chic as can be!

You're like a rare vintage ripple
A vintage they'll never forget
So pour me a teeny weenie triple
And we can toast the fact we ain't dead yet!

I can't stop eating
Your hairline's receding
Soon there'll be nothing at all
So, you'll wear a wig
While I roast a pig
Hey! Pass the Geritol

Glenn Miller had brass, that Chubby Checker's a gas
But they all pass eventually
You'll never be passé, hip hooray!
You're timeless to me

(They dance.)

[EDNA]
You're like a broken down chevy
All you need is a fresh coat of paint

[WILBUR]
And Edna, you got me goin' hot and heavy
You're fat and old, but baby, boring you ain't!

[WILBUR & EDNA]
Some folks don't get it, but we never fret it
'Cause we know that time is our friend
Yeah it's plain to see that you're stuck with me
Until the bitter end

And we got a kid
Who's blowin' the lid
Off the Turnblad family tree

[EDNA]
You'll always hit the spot
Big shot!
You're timeless to me

[WILBUR]
You'll always be du jour
Mon amour
You're timeless to me

[EDNA]
You'll always be first string

[WILBUR]
Ring-a-ding-ding!

[WILBUR & EDNA]
You're timeless to me

[EDNA]
You're timeless to me

[WILBUR]
You're timeless to me

[WILBUR & EDNA]
You're timeless to me

[EDNA]
Ha-cha-cha-cha-cha-cha!