Marc Shaiman
News of Augustus
(The next morning, Mrs. Bucket returns home carrying laundry and news. Willy Wonka is holding a competition. Buy one of his Wonka Bars and you have a chance to find a Golden Ticket. A ticket means a visit to the Wonka factory and a lifetime’s supply of confectionery. There are only five Golden Tickets in the whole world.)

[CHARLIE, spoken]
Oh, Grandpa! Look! The headlines!

[GRANDPA JOE, spoken]
What headlines?

[MRS. BUCKET, spoken]
Read it, Charlie!

[CHARLIE, spoken]
Willy Wonka has announced an amazing competition.​
Find a Golden Ticket and you could win a dream trip to his Chocolate Factory with a guided tour conducted by Mr. Willy Wonka himself.​

[GRANDPA JOE, spoken]
Five Golden Tickets have been hidden inside the wrappers of five Wonka chocolate bars.​
Your challenge is to find one.​

(Charlie is desperate to win one but the Buckets have no money. Fortunately Grandpa Joe has saved up 53 and a half pence. That’s just enough for one Wonka Bar which Charlie will receive on his birthday. Eager for news Charlie brings out their homemade television, Mr. Bucket pedals an old bike to provide power, and they learn from the news team of Jerry & Cherry of the first Golden Ticket winner. He is quite enormous and his name is Augustus Gloop.)

[JERRY, spoken]
Breaking news!
We interrupt this program to bring you news that the first Wonka ticket winner has been found.
To find out more let’s go straight over to our chief confectionary correspondent Cherry Sunday.
Cherry, where are you?
[CHERRY, spoken]
Jerry, I’m in Bavaria!
Here in this sleepy mountain town it seems like a chocolate dream has come true for local butcher’s son and three times regional bratwurst eating champion, Augustus Gloop!

[MRS. GLOOP, spoken]
Augustus, my little pumpkin, smile for the cameras!

[CHERRY, spoken]
Augustus, how do you feel?

[AUGUSTUS]
(burp)

[CHERRY, spoken]
Charming…
So, Mrs. Gloop, this story of hope
How did it all begin?