Marc Shaiman
Gum!
(The next room is the Inventing Room, full of test tubes and bubbling pots of coloured liquid. White coated Oompa-loompas mix and stir. Willy gives every child an Everlasting Gobstopper as a souvenir of the tour but Violet is unimpressed. Willy wonders if she might be interested in his latest creation, in which an entire Sunday roast dinner is contained in one tiny strip of gum. When Violet sees gum she can’t resist popping it into her mouth.)

[VIOLET, spoken]
Tomato soup!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
That’s the starter, it’s quite traditional.

[VIOLET, spoken]
Roast chicken!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Sunday afternoon, all the family in the parlour, pick of the pops on the radio…

[VIOLET, spoken]
Potatoes and gravy!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Granny dribbling in the corner…

[VIOLET, spoken]
Fizzy orange!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Violet, whatever you do, don’t hit pudding.
[MR. BEAUREGARDE, spoken]
Ignore him, Vi! You chew, girl. Do it!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Violet, no…

[VIOLET, spoken]
Cheese and crackers!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Violet, don’t get to pudding!

[VIOLET, spoken]
Oh, my…

[MR. BEAUREGARDE, spoken]
What is it honey?

[VIOLET, spoken]
Pie!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Pudding.

[MR. BEAUREGARDE, spoken]
What kind of pie, Vi?
[VIOLET, spoken]
Blueberry pie, Daddy! Blueberry pie!

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Pudding…

[MR. BEAUREGARDE, spoken]
My god, Wonka, what is happening to her?

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
Excess fructose in the fluid sacs, I’m afraid.

[MR. BEAUREGARDE, spoken]
What the pop does that mean?

[WILLY WONKA, spoken]
It means… it means… she’s turning into a blueberry!

(As Violet spins about like a purple glitter disco ball, the Oompa-loompas break out their platform shoes to sing and dance of her fate.)