[Verse 1]
I'm sitting in a park drinking some tins
Smoking half a cigarette I found in a bin
I see a little boy
He jumps of the swings
He hits a load of nettles and they're stinging his shins
He's crying for his mother but she isn't around
He's sitting on the ground making waa waa sounds
I run over to help him sit him up on my lap
I make a funny face
Hahaha, he starts to laugh
He says his name is Ivan
I bought him some sweets
I take him by the hand as we walk the streets
I got him bottle 'coz, he's my favourite boy
I made him promise we'd be friends til the day he dies

[Chorus]
Knock Knock
Who's there? it's my little teddy bear
Spoiling Ivan, Spoiling Ivan
Ding Dong guess who it's my little kangaroo
Spoiling Ivan spoiling Ivan
Ooooh, Never known a boy like you before

[Verse 2]
He's good at darts and hugging
And doing what he's told
I'd love to get him drunk but Ivan's only 6 years old
I showed him my big muscles
He thinks they're really cool
And he said he wants a snake for christmas so I bought him 2
And when his folks are sleeping
I call around to play
We rob his parents heroin and throw it all away
We put on roller blades and skate around all day
With bellies full of sticky buds and fizzy lemonade!
[Chorus]
Knock Knock
Who's there? it's my little teddy bear
Spoiling Ivan, Spoiling Ivan
Ding Dong guess who it's my little kangaroo
Spoiling Ivan spoiling Ivan
Ooooh

[Verse 3]
And then one summer's day
I call around to play
But all his stuff was gone and Ivan must have moved away
I couldn't take the pain
I took a midnight train I opened up a bistro in the south of Spain
And 20 years went by
My heart began to mend
I learned to live my life alone without him as a friend
One day when I was working
And sweeping up the floor
I heard a voice that took me back 'bout 20 years or more
I dropped the broom and pan
Across the room and ran, across the room I ran
And it was Ivan who'd grown up to be a lovely man
I said can you imagine the fun we're going to have
With nothing else to do but hang around and have a laugh
He said he's much too busy to join in with my fun
But maybe I could introduce you to my little son
He looks a good bit like him
And boy they act the same
He throws me up a high five
He says Nigel is my name
I take him by the hand
And then we walk away
I made him promise we'd be friends until his dying day
[Chorus 2]
Knock Knock guess who? It's not Ivan but he'll do
Spoiling Nigel, Spoiling Nigel
Ding Dong who's there? someone else who really cares
Spoiling Nigel, Spoiling Nigel
Oooooh used to know a boy like you before!