[Daughter]
Oh those paintings had shifty eyes

[Mom]
Yeah they shifted with each new shift of guys
You see it was the high school yearbook crew
I had hired to look through
All the artwork with the holes in their sides

[Daughter]
“What about the werewolf man?”

[Mom]
“Well that was just your neighbour Stan
Now, he might be hairy, but he’s anything but scary
Cause he just sent us this homemade jam”

[Mom]
And I know It was a night scare
But honey I was right there the whole time
I told you it was ghost hair
But it was really capellini extra fine
I was a sweaty sight
You were not ready
I might have taken things too far
For this night scare
[Daughter]
I didn’t like the swarm of crows

[Mom]
Well they honestly weren't part of the show
They picked the lock that day
I don’t know what else to say
I know I’m supposed to assuage you
But I’ll never persuade you
It was scripted so I guess there you go

[Daughter]
At least I know about the grapes!

[Mom]
Uhh... sorry honey, what grapes?

[Daughter]
You know the ones you peel and then you make us feel

[Mom]
Oh yeah those, ah, funny thing about those… they’re actually real human eyes… yeah

[Mom]
I know It was a night scare
But honey I was right there the whole time
I told you it was ghost hair
But it was really capellini extra fine
I was a sweaty sight
You were not ready
I might have taken things too far
For this night scare
[Daughter]
Mama, I don’t want to do this again

[Mom]
Baby, I didn’t mean to hurt you, and this is where it ends
Because if you knew how much I’ve spent
You’d wonder how we pay the rent
Yes, it was far too large a dent to justify the night scare
Honey I was right there the whole time
It’s not like I don’t care
Just thought I’d send some shivers down your spine
I was a sweaty sight
You were not ready
I might have taken things too far
For this night scare