Essam Muhammad
Secret To Tell
[Verse 1: Boonaa Mohammed]
Stuck to my pillow can't get out of bed
And I hear all these voices they clouding my head
Did you just hear what I said? This ain't pretend
Feels like I must have been dead
Family they tell me it's all in my brain
Finally they tell me I'm going insane
Tell me which surahs you read, am I possessed?
Why does the devil exist
Why is he stuck in my chest, call the exorcist
Does he take visa or cheque?
Popping these pills that they gave me to chill
And I mixed with Advil and these shots of NyQuil
Over the dosage and over indulging in self medication and pain metamorphosis
If life is a test, where's your patience?
How can you tell us that you were not blessed?
I didn't say that, I said I'm sad, I don't why this is happening dad
Yes I have I prayed, really I tried
Making wudu with the tears from my eyes
I can't explain, why I'm in pain, I get migraines again and again
Can't go outside, access denied, said I'll feel better but I know I lied
Bro, everything is so slow like woah
Sorrow swallowed me whole like black holes
I've got a secret to tell, I am not feeling too well

[Chorus: Ilyas Mao & Boonaa Mohammed]
I've got a secret to tell, I am not feeling too well
I hear these voices, stuck in my head
I'm losing focus, can't see ahead
And I know you see there's something wrong
But I'm scared to say what's going on
I've got a secret to tell, I am not feeling to well
[Verse 2: Boonaa Mohammed]
Scholars they say that believers don't feel this
But if I do does that turn me to a heathen
And what is the reason, the point of this pain
You gave me Life and You made me from clay
There's no mistakes, am I too late
Have my sins already sealed up my fate?
I'm so alone, Nobody's home
Couldn't be bothered to pick up the phone
And let them inside, just some passage of time
And I bet nobody wouldn't even care if I died
So what's the point, I'll say goodbye
Packing my things and heading for the sky
Life is so cruel, news makes me cry
Killing this ummah so how can I smile?
My friends online are having a great time
Babies and weddings while I'm in decline
Money is tight and hate my 9 to 5
Stuck in this rat race chasing a deadline
People keep saying that I've gotta be strong
But I wish that they would all just leave me alone
And be on my own, I'll be alright
After the darkness there must be a light
Don't need a judge and don't care what you think
We got so many stigmas it's making me sick
Please help me I'm drowning, stuck in this well
Asking for heaven, cause I've been living in hell
I've got a secret to tell, I am not feeling too well
[Chorus: Ilyas Mao] x2
I hear these voices, stuck in my head
I'm losing focus, can't see ahead
And I know you see there's something wrong
But I'm scared to say what's going on
I've got a secret to tell, I am not feeling to well

[Outro: Ilyas Mao]
I've got a secret to tell, I am not feeling to well