Asshole Song

[Verse 1]

If I was closer to you

I would stay in your dorm room

I would beg you to lay in bed with me all day

If I was closer to you

I would take you to the movies

Hold your hand and tell you sweet things

Call you "baby"

And if I wasn't such an asshole

I would answer all your phone calls

I'd reply to all your letters and tell you how much you really mean



[Chorus]

Baby, I'm mean

Unless I'm drunk

I said I'm only nice when I'm drunk

And I'm not drunk often enough



[Verse 2]

And if I hadn't left you

I'd probably still hate the sunset

I'd hate watching you get dressed and ready in the mornings for school

And if I hadn't left you

I'd probably still hate me

For thinking someone like you could break me and make me feel a fool



[Chorus]

Baby, I'm mean

Unless I'm drunk

Said I'm only nice when I'm drunk

And I'm not drunk often enough

Oh baby, I'm mean

Unless I think that I'm dying

I think I'm dying all of the time

I think that I'll call

And fuck it all



[Bridge]

And if I wasn't such an asshole

I would make a conversation

I would ask you how your day went

Like I give a fuck about it

And if I wasn't such an asshole

I would answer all your phone calls

I'd reply to all your letters and tell you how much you really mean

But you don't



[Chorus]

Oh baby, I'm mean

Unless I think that I'm dying

I think that I'm dying all of the time

I think that I'll call

And fuck it all