[Intro Verse]
I smoked a cigarette in a social setting
Just wanted to fit in
I’ve got my vices
But this is one I didn't have the guts to try in high school
It just made me cough, feel like shit the next day
I tried again and I threw up immediately

[Verse 1]
I grew up trying to stay straight laced
Look how much good that did
I drank at least six days this week
But still don’t go to parties
I keep saying I’ll change once I finish this last case
But there’s bottles in the cabinet
That I don’t want to waste

[Chorus]
So I'm sipping on a scotch I hate
My reward for getting through today
I did nothing but skip another meal and walk
Around a Target
No matter what I try
I can’t soothe the shame from last night
I’m too worn out to hеlp myself
Oh well
[Verse 2]
I called it sеlf care, claimed treating myself
My friends affirmed my newfound health
I’m just as sad as ever, indignant as I was
When they staged an intervention
At a comedy show on the Seaport years ago

[Chorus]
And I'm still sipping scotch I hate
My reward for getting through today
I did nothing but skip another meal and walk around a Target
No matter what I try
I can’t soothe the shame from last night
I’m too run down to help myself
Oh well

[Bridge]
Have another, have some more
You’re fine, it’s all under control
Have another, just one more

[Outro Chorus]
I’ll be choking down a scotch I hate
‘cause I barely made it through today
I did nothing but skip another meal and walk around a Target
Why bother, why try
I’ll still be ashamed of tonight
I’m too fucked up
To help myself
Oh well
Too hungover
To get better
To get well