I've just come back from England
With astounding, scientific sort of news
There exist in England living creatures
Much the same as me and you

Sure, it sounds fantastic though
But facts are facts most everywhere
That was in New York, it was in Paris
Maybe the coast of Peru

No no no, no not fair, it was England
Yes it was, it was England
Yes it was, it was in her coal

How was England weather?
Much like ours, but with a moister sort of air
Their communication?
Much like ours, but with a drier sort of air
Reproduction?
Good question: find a big surprise in there
That's just like New York, just like Paris
Just like the coast of Peru

No no no, me and her, there in England
Me and her, there in England
Me and her, there in England, oh
No no no, lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there in England, oh

England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...

No no no, lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there and you know ?

All right, I could tell you darling
That you feel it's just some wild wild fantasy
In a parallel existence
Where we thought we masters really ought to be

Sure, go on and doubt it that I dreamed it up
But friend, I know that everywhere is just like England
Everywhere is just like England
And England's just like everywhere I know
No no no, everywhere is just like England
Everywhere is just like England
And England's just like everywhere I know