[Verse 1: Rhett and Link]
We've got the greatest job on Earth
And we're not even on Earth
We're orbiting the world, you see
Collecting space debris
Expended rockets, expired satellites
Circling the globe, endangering space flight
We're the guys cleaning up the mess
Putting astronauts' families' fears to rest

[Pre-Hook]
You wouldn't believe the premium on my life insurance policy
Even a paint chip would take off my arm
Traveling at orbital velocity

[Hook]
Collectin' space junk, space waste, space stuff
We make it safe for shuttles to fly
We're trash men, weightless trash men!
Cleaning up the crap you left behind

[Verse 2]
We got hit by Soviet trash last year
From the cosmonauts on Mir
But our worst memory was when we
Were sprayed by frozen pee
Here's some old bag of toiletries (What's in it?)
Sunscreen and hydrocortisone cream
And the ashes of Gene Roddenberry
Ah! Tom Hank's script from Apollo 13!
[Pre-Hook]
You wouldn't believe the premium on my life insurance policy
Even a toenail would cut off my head
Traveling at orbital velocity

[Hook]
Collectin' space junk, space waste, space stuff
Living the cosmic custodian life
We're trash men, weightless trash men!
Scouring space while trying not to die!