A lot of people don't bother about their friends in the Vegetable Kingdom
They think, "Ah, what can I say? What can a person like myself say to a vegetable?"
But the answer is simple, my friends...
Just call, and tell them how you feel
About muffins, pumpkins
Wax paper, caledonia, mahoganies, elbows
And green things in general
And soon: a new rapport!
You and your new little green & yellow buddies
Grooving together! Oh no!
Maintaining your coolness together!
Worshipping together in the church of your choice!
Only in America! Woh-oh-oh-ah-agh-h

[Verse]
Call any vegetable
Call it by name
You gotta call one today
When you get off the train

[Chorus]
Call any vegetable
And the chances are good
Ahr, that the vegetable will respond to you

[Outro]
Oh no! Can you see them responding?
The pumpkin is breathing hard:
Huffa puffa huffa puffa
What a pumpkin