[Dave]
If I could write you a song to make you fall in love
I would already have you up under my arms
I used up all of my tricks, I hope that you like this
But you probably won't, you think you're cooler than me

[Karkat]
You got designer shades just to hide your face, and you wear 'em around like you're cooler than me
And you never say "Hey" or remember my name
And it's probably 'cause you think you're cooler than me

Look at this felt suit and the tie 'round your neck
You're a poser for sure and it ain't cool
Mirror shades don't shiеld you at all
I can see right to your core

I got you all figured out!
You need evеryone's eyes just to feel seen
Behind your facade, you're afraid to be judged, but you judge everyone else-
Is your pedistal fun?

[Dave]
If I could write you a song to make you fall in love
I would already have you up under my arm
I used up all of my tricks, I hope that you like this
But you probably won't, you think you're cooler than me
[Karkat]
You got designer shades just to hide your face, and you wear 'em around like you're cooler than me
And you never say "Hey" or remember my name
And it's probably 'cause you think you're cooler than me

[Dave]
You're full of anger, really nothing else
And on my planet you're called a midget
And how are you supposed to be a fierce troll if your horns are one inch long?

I got you all figured out!
You act tough like a man but you're a pussy
Your insecurity reeks across the room
And how can I see who you're really meant to be?

[Both]
And it sure seems (and it sure seems) you got no doubts
And we both see (and we both see) you got this quadrent picked out

If I could write you a song to make you fall in love
I would already have you up under my arm
I used up all of my tricks, I hope that you like this
But you probably won't because you think you're cooler than me

[Karkat]
You've got designer shades to hide your face, and you wear 'em around like you're cooler than me
[Dave]
You never say "Hey" or remember my name, and -

[Both]
- it's probably because you think you're cooler than me