[SPOKEN INTRO]
This is an absolutely smashing party
Isn't it just?
I'm having the time of my life
Me too
Indubitably!
Did you read it in the paper?
It's so nice
(Cheering)
What- Who the devil is that?!

[Lyrics]
My name is Conor G and I'm the new kid on the block
And if you don't like it you can suck my big fat
Lock all your doors cause Keith! Party's in your neighbourhood
We're dressed to the nines and we're up to no good
I'm gonna rock sock shock shamrock the block
We'll be rocking the stack when you punch the clock
Walk into the beat when we hear an invitation
Only party in your street better warn your cronies
I'll take half a pill, then half a pill more
I've necked seven pills when I rock to your front door
[?]
Don't do drugs (or) do a lot of drugs, mixed messages from the Keith! Party thugs
Rollin' up the drive with Keith in the crew
Is this your house? Oh yeah, who are you?
The party's passed you so it's a good thing we're here
Get the party started once you buy us some beer and tequila
[?]
Better warm up for this Keith! Party sesh!
You know me as Hotdog but my real name is Luke
My dads name is [?] and my sister is cute!
We once played a gig at a sci-fi convention
Then [?] walked past and [?]
Now I have a big bump on my head
That controls what I say just like when I said
"My mum owns a dildo" That wasn't me!
[?]
Sexy! Is what people call HD
My mo makes me look like I'd be in a porn movie
Maybe I have
A mysterious fog
Why do you think I'm called fucking hotdog?

(My name is hotdog, my name is hotdog)
(Sexy! Is what people call HD)
(My name is hotdog, my name is hotdog)
(Sexy! Is what people call HD)

Ladies and gentlemen, please give it the fuck up for the main man himself;
KEITH GRAEME MCDOUGALL!

Keith's come to gatecrash your birthday bash
Eat your birthday cake and smoke your stash
I'm the party invader
Hungry like an alligator
Hate me now but you'll thank me later
You party like you're on an old age pension
Your place is so clean like you've got an inspection
I'll make this the party that wins the election
All it needs is a hot Keith injection!
I'm Keith, I'm the party's main man
Got a foolproof campaign plan
Spreading vibes across the land
From your kitchen to the desert sand
Today's your birthday but tomorrow the world
You've got a lot to gain from Tay Conor and Bourke
And Talky, Mac, Gez, Tregz, Nev, Dog and Lee
Your party needs a dose of Keith!
When I say Keith, you say Party!
KEITH!
PARTY!
KEITH!
PARTY!
WHEN I SAY KEITH, YOU SAY PARTY!
KEITH!
PARTY!
KEITH!
PARTY!
Now somebody, anybody, everybody scream!