[Verse 1]
I make a date for golf, and you can bet your life it rains
I try to give a party, and the guy upstairs complains
I guess I'll go through life just catching colds and missing trains
Everything happens to me

[Verse 2]
I never miss a thing, I've had the measles and the mumps
And when I play an ace, my partner always trumps
I guess I'm just a fool who never looks before he jumps
Everything happens to me

[Pre-Chorus]
At first, my heart thought you could break this jinx for me
That love would turn the trick to end despair
But now I just can't fool this heart that thinks for me
I've mortgaged all my castles in the air

[Chorus]
I've telegraphed and phoned and sent an airmail special too
Your answer was goodbye and there was even postage due
I fell in love just once, and then it had to be with you
Everything happens to me

[Instrumental Break]
[Chorus]
I've telegraphed and phoned and I sent an airmail special too
Your answer was goodbye and there was even postage due
I fell in love just once, and then it had to be with you
Everything happens to me