[Verse 1: Anthony & Ian]
Walkin' down the street and everybody's starin'
Just jealous of what I'm wearin'
That's right, it's a fanny pack, bitches
Hot pink and matches my britches
You're thinking, "That guy's insane
Damn, what's his name? What's wrong with his brain?"
I'm perfectly sane, just hear what I say
Everything I need's just one zip away (C'mon!)

[Chorus: Anthony]
My fanny pack, my fanny pack is all I need
It's on my waist while I shower and while I pee
It holds my hairspray, so I look good every day
It holds me tight and keeps the Bogeyman away

[Verse 2: Anthony]
You can't mess with my fanny pack, I'm a maniac
It's a fact, you better watch your back
Packs more than a backpack
One time I looked inside, and I found an iMac
Only tough guys wear fanny packs
Hulk Hogan, Chuck Norris and this guy...
Diss me and you better watch your back
I'll smack you with my 20-pound fanny pack
[Verse 3: Anthony]
I've been attacked by a wild beast
I think it was a furry hippopotamus from Greece
I needed a weapon for the fight
What I pulled out was a stick of dynamite
Makes great gifts for the holidays
"It's my d**k in a pack, baby"
If you talk smack, I'll put you in my sack
What's this? It's a midget in my fanny pack!