[Hook]
Screw you Anthony-y-y
Pants always full of pee-e-e
You cried when your goldfish died, like a little pussy
Screw you Anthony-y-y
Gave you Hepatitis C
I vomit every time I see your naked body

[Verse 1]
I remember at the theater where we met
The first time, you ran out the movie hecka wet
The pants kind, then you asked for a napkin to wipe it up
'Cause you dropped some "water" on the front of your pants
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Everyone knew the "water" was pee
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Pissed yourself watching Paranormal Activity

[Verse 2]
He thought he had perfect abs
Drew them on with a sharpie
Looked like a douchebag
Uh-uh, oh, yeah
Oh, yeah
I'd catch him stealing superhero costumes from all the little kids
And cutting out the abs
Putting them under tight-ass T-shirts
It was so sad, so sad
[Hook]
Screw you Anthony-y-y
Pants always full of pee-e-e
You cried when your goldfish died, like a little pussy
Screw you Anthony-y-y
Gave you Hepatitis C
I vomit every time I see your naked body

[Verse 3]
I remember that one time that I caught you humming along
Wearing all my clothes and dancing to my songs
Was nasty, nasty, nasty-y-y-y-y
I knew you were a pussy when I saw you
Dancing to my songs
Dressed up in my high heels and my thong
With my face tattooed on your butt
Oh, no!
Why the hell is it on your butt?
God, no!
Woah

[Verse 4]
And just in case, Anthony tries to say, "It ain't so"
I secretly taped our breakup on video
One last thing before I come to an end
I cheated on Anthony
With his amazing best friend
And the greatest bowl-cut hair
And thighs, oh, so meaty
He's better than Anthony
And the only one for me ever
[Hook]
Sorry Anthony-y-y
But you really do smell like pee-e-e
And I'm with Ian now 'cause his thighs are so meaty

[Outro]
And his butt cheeks are totally firmer than yours