[Intro: Tika Budiarachman]
One day I’ll let someone see the rotten part of my heart and I’ll let them love me anyways
I know that you are the one who suffers from indecisiveness
Or perhaps it is this cobalt boredom that chooses me time after time as it’s next victim
I know that I am just a bystander in the middle of all of this crossfire and I’m just not willing to admit when I should leave
But you are just so clueless about it all
And I, am just so blue
I will pretend that I am content within the safety of your arms, wrapped in your denim jacket
I will pretend that your words still coat my mind
But I am not happy, or maybe I am happy or was happy with you
You were always just so far out of my grasp
That’s why it just seemed so easy for me to pull off
Because it’s easy pretending to love someone
When they aren’t here to sit in your eyes and show you how much they love you
This time I just avoid your eyes
This time I just unhear your words
This time I just don’t believe you when you say you’ll change
But this is one fucked up fear of mine where I know that it is not the same with us and I’m fighting to decide whether or not this is love ideas of a sick joke
To make me feel so blue for the sake of a concept
Or maybe you weren’t who you said you were
Maybe I’ve been deceived, tricked, fooled, double crossed
You were the one place that was supposed to keep me safe
[Verse: Korban Baxter]
We lost another n***a to the pit
This the type of shit, that happens when you living near the strip
Shawty set my n***a up past a quarter a fifth
And my brothers ski mask too tight could never fit
Carry extendo clips size of Vecna’s fingertips
N***as down the block and they claiming fake Crip
So I pray to God with the sharks I never swim
But my rubber stay tucked while I’m ducking from the fins
And I listen how you raised me right
Stayed inside the house cause my momma raised her babies right
Never played with guns cause my uncle said we had to fight
Never did no drugs cause that wasn’t what the ladies liked
Never was a thug but I thug with demeanor
Constant tug of war with the image that I dreamed of
N***a throw your fours when you linking with the team son
This is art of war strokes of red with my paintbrush
And I light a candle for the lost ones
Don’t linger in that darkness
N***a, you are the chosen one
Put your finger where your heart his
Hide your kids and hide your wife
N***as will always try to take yo life
And they’ll eat your plate and don’t think twice
As they see your face then snitch on sight
So you pull up with the pump
Next time they see the n***a face is on channel twenty-nine past a quarter five
Satellite Send a light
There’s children in the ghetto
And they’re praying for a different life
Propaganda in the schools
But in the black ones that’s the only ones where the guards gotta keep a tool
And that’s fucked up
I don’t gotta say a word
The cycle still in motion
While the morals of the white man’s design they claim so divine stay getting blurred
Do you hear me
I speak for the fallen ones
N***a this the truth that they try to hide in theory
But I still manage to reach the youth
My visions still seeing through