[Verse 1: Oswald]
I'm your average small town, small life
Small hopes, small scale, small fry just like you
Or, I was 'til I hopped into a ball pit and got hit with a switcheroo
Now, instead of bein' average
I'm completely the same, but my father's been replaced
With a yellow killer rabbit monster, always givin' chase

[Refrain: Oswald & Springtrap]
I try to run away
I always come back
I go outside to play
I always play catch
I remember I forgot to eat today
I always bring snacks
Escape attempts are all brief
I always come back
Nothin' to hide underneath
I always check cracks
Even if I lock the bathroom door and brush my teeth
I always fight plaque

[Chorus: Oswald]
I gotta fix this ASAP, before my dad is Springtrap
I thought it was an act, but he's just gone mad
'Cause ever since his big nap, he's actin' less like Springtrap
And actin' more like Springtrap's my dad
He's still freaky and scary and I'm no less aware, he
Trapped my old dad somewhere deep inside that pit
But while I'd like to save him, that would be misbehavin'
And Springtrap-dad won't like that one bit
[Verse 2: Oswald & Springtrap]
He's your average big town, big life
Big hopes, big scale, big fry rabbit ghost
Or, he was 'til he hopped out of that ball pit as a different host
I guess he used to be William Afton
Or Spring Bonnie or some magic Faz-Goo sort
But right now, he's at my dining table, callin' me—
"Young sport" What?

[Refrain: Oswald & Springtrap]
He got some milk from the store
I always come back
He cooks up pasta galore
I always serve mac'
Adds some extra cheese powder we had in the drawer
I always save packs
Somehow from beyond the grave
I always come back
He wants to teach me to shave?
I always spit facts
But when I look in the mirror, I feel so afraid
I always refract

[Chorus: Oswald]
I'm still trying to unpack that my dad is Springtrap
I thought he was a threat, but he's not so bad
'Cause ever since his big nap, he's actin' less like Springtrap
And actin' more like Springtrap's my dad
He's still freaky and scary, but I'm a bit less wary
He mostly just kills flies outside that pit
As long as noise ain't playin', he won't go back to slayin'
'Cause Springtrap-dad don't like that one bit
[Bridge: Springtrap]
What have I done?
This child is hardly my son
And yet something compels me to stay
To care for what should be my prey
I'm a mess
Why am I reading books to this pest?
With one bite, I could harvest his soul
But that dad-ness has taken control

[Guitar Solo]

[Chorus: Oswald]
I can't just call this a wrap and keep my dad as Springtrap
He's gotten way too comfy here at my pad
'Cause ever since his big nap, he's actin' less like Springtrap
And actin' more like Springtrap's my dad
He's still freaky and scary, but I think I know where he
Trapped my old dad, I'm goin' into the pit
I know that I can save him, it might be misbehavin'
But Springtrap-dad is far from legit

[Post-Chorus: Oswald & Springtrap]
Oswald
Yeah?
Do you wanna get ice cream after school?
Well, maybe dad can wait just a bit