Song starts at 1:00

-spoken-
Okay...
Time to deck you three in the halls!

-sung-
You've been naughty pests this year...
Sod off, shove it up your rear!
I gave you all of your heart's desires!
Then why did your gifts all catch on fire (They're on fire?!)

How'd that happen?
All that crap went up into flames you're to blame!
(Well, ain't that a shame? But you three are the ones to blame)
For this and more! Stole Santa and that means war!

That Santa's a naive, bumbling fool!
I'll toss you into my cola pool!


Edd:⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Zanta:
I won't hear excuses⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ You don't
Just set Santa ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Realize
Loose if ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Look at this through my Eyes
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀This guy's enabling
You arеn't craving
Misbehaving!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Misbehaving!

Allright, say I let thе fat man go
He gives everyone gifts
What happens next, then? Tell me whatcha know?

I would suppose they'd have a lovely day
Much nicer than they'd have with your mouldy corpse
In the bloody sleigh!

Because He's such a softie
His judgement's far from lofty
And sinners get nice presents, too!

Hey, nobody is perfect
So what if some mirthless
Undeserving folks slip through?

Just imagine this:
A world of happiness
With a Zanta to make sure it remains...
Those who tell hateful lies or eat this pie
Will relent when i eat their brains!
I'm right, admit it, guys...
Who are you to judge?
You're made of icky sludge
And you don't have a single merry bone...
Plus, everybody nowadays is armed!
You'd get shot before you reach their home!

Edd:⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Zanta:
You wanna double die?
Your christmas spirit's gone⠀⠀⠀ You can't stop me!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Got a list im checkin' twice
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀To feast on those who aren't nice
But your rotting husk lives on! ⠀ Christmas will be
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Rid of all its scrooges, after ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Zanta's
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Through with them...
Just accept it⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ My business was undone
Joy comes through the world
Through kindness
Not by making villains mindless
We'll protect it ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you're smart you'd better run...
You won't get to wreck it
After this rap battle's done!

Santa should stand for joy!⠀⠀⠀ Christmas was once even worse
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀In time i couldn't bear the curse
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Of just simply sitting idly by...
Not for devouring bad girls⠀⠀⠀So one Christmas day i changed ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀And boys!⠀⠀⠀⠀ my ways
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ to make sinners pay
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀But before I could act on it
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀I kinda died...⠀
Christmas is so pure and calm⠀ If you're fighting my cause
The whole world loves it, save
For Tom
We all need it to keep going!
I know you're prob'ly filled⠀⠀⠀I'll prove just who's the real Santa ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Claus!
With doubt, but just hear me
Out its goodness is always ever-growing!

-spoken-
How can you defeat somebody you can't...
Recognize?!

Oh no! Which one do i shoot?

-sung-

Edd, you gotta help me! Zanta's way more stealthy
Than I gave him credit for
And now there's two of them before
My brand-new, capable-of-seeing-people eyes
I can take him down, But which one should die?

Tom:⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Zanta:
Is it the one behind? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Clearly, I'm the real me!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Ho ho ho, you feel me?
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀That one's totally undead
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀So fill that faker full of lead
He looks the same, man, I'm⠀⠀⠀⠀Oh wait, Aren't you the one that Losing my mind! ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀hates this holiday?
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀You're screwed no matter who ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀you shoot, so fire away!

-spoken-
Ho ho ho...

You idiot, you shot the wrong Santa!

AAAUGHHHHHHH!

-sung-

Edd:⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Zanta:
Tom? Merry Christmas, Tom, you got ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀what you deserved
That's not fair!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ you're up next, Edd-boy, you ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ haven't got the nerve
He wasn't aware how eyes can be⠀ to take me down when I'm so ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ just and clever
And now he can't see!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ C'mon, do your worst, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ whatever!
You've made it personal,⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀If I wanted to I could just bite ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀He hasn't done a thing wrong⠀your head

Even worse, you hit him with that⠀ But perhaps we ought to make⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀Laser mid-song!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ a deal instead...

Don't you think all of this makes⠀⠀⠀Santa's sleigh has got a broken⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀It quite clear ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ zed gear...

Your decaying carcass shouldn't⠀⠀ Give me yours and I'll judge ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Be here?!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀you next year!

That's a tempting offer,⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀The choice is yours for the ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀But if we gathered round⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀picking
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀but hurry up, clock's ticking
Gave you the zed gear⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀it's nearly Christmas eve!
And bid you goodbye
Wouldn't really get Santa's⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Best install that final piece
Sleigh off the ground⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀To make my takeover complete
Cos it doesn't make sense how⠀⠀⠀or you and your friends are ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ never gonna leave!
Anything flies!

You've been a tough opponent
But in this final moment
All I can feel deep inside my soul...
Is strong Christmas cheer (or maybe gas)
Or a cola from my past
Til you love Christmas at last
You'll never be ho ho whole!

Song ends at 4:03