[Verse 1]
When I was spat onto the earth in a stream of guts
By mother nature, that green eyed slut
I wasn't the first to get forced from a cut
In one to whom I still shall stay stuck
Staring from the cradle let my eyes take in
The baby-speak of my brain-dead kin
Their goo-goo goggles reflecting the grin
Of a chub faced alien

[Pre-Chorus 1]
Well, if you think I'm being harsh
Well, baby, keep on counting stars
Sing it with me now

[Chorus]
Because I hate everyone
I hate everyone
I hate everyone
Upon this cursed earth

[Verse 2]
Then I grew a few hairs where the sun don't shine
Packed me in a classroom to count the time
Studying the history of men's minds
Chasing tail and committing hate crimes
A rich hippie girl with a gas-guzzler
Forced myself to fall in love with her
She was so strung out, she'd swear it never occurred
The honkey king went back on his word
[Pre-Chorus 2]
And the next one did the same
The blind leading the lame
All together now

[Chorus]
I hate everyone
I hate everyone
I hate everyone
Upon this cursed earth

[Bridge 1]
How does it make you feel to be wanted?
How does it make you feel to be one of many?
How does it make you feel to be blunted?
How does it make you feel?
How does it make you feel?

[Bridge 2]
I hate actors who seem genuine
I hate my ex-girlfriend though she's feminine
I hate that singer with the denim skin
I hate everyone
I hate that hospital in Texas
I hate the rapper in the Lexus
I hate my best friend from third grade who tricked me into saying I was gay in front of the whole class because I... I just thought that it meant "happy"
I hate everyone
[Chorus]
I hate everyone
I hate everyone
I hate everyone
I hate everyone

[Outro]
And wait a second, 'cause
I'm mired in hypocrisy
Yet I'm still down with JC
I guess that "everyone", it includes me
And that's why I'm a humanist, okay
(I hate everyone)