Okay...
The time is about...
4:14am
I just finished a song on the album
1 out of more than 10 songs on the album
But I don't know how to end it
And today I finished it one by one
Yeah... I'm feeling quite happy
It's good
But when I finished all of them
And I looked at the clock and it's 4:00am now
I started to ask myself one question...
What I ask is about...
If tomorrow I'm going to die
What should I do first?
What should I do first?
The first thing that I have on my mind
Is...
I have to finish my album
So I can rest in peace
If not I'm still busy with my computer
Can't go
Can't go anywhere
Even if I die, I still have a soul
My spirit would wander around with​ my computer
With the bass
With musical instruments
When I think about it
One more question pops up in my mind...
It asks me about...
It asks...
If I ruined my life by myself
Then what is the solution?
Let me explain further
The first thing is
I don't know what kind of life mine is
I don't understand because it has too much stress and it's so messy
Since I was young
*lights cigarette*
My life was like a false reality, it fooled me
It was not like other people's life
Those people who are happy every day
When I look at myself
I don't feel like myself anymore
There's no happiness, laughter...
Sometimes I have to fake my smile
Sometimes I have to cheer myself up in face of problems
And I have to lean into the falsehood
Then it makes me fall into depression
I feel that...
Wow
I didn't know that this video (voice memo) would go anywhere
But I wanted to film myself
In case one day I'm gone
We'd still have this video to show
To share
The first thing
The main thing
I want to say in this video
Is that I was fooled by this life
Sometimes it makes me forget everything around me
Forget family
Forget to take care of my health
And choose an alcoholic drink
Cigarette
Choose to live alone
And if there is...
A next generation
This next gen...
Who would walk the same path as me
I'd say don't...
Don't focus too much on these vices/sins
I think that...
It's not good for mental health
I don't know what other people would think but
I'm speaking on what I've experienced for many years
We don't do it 'just because'
For having fun...
We made it from our heart
Did it with our brains
Made it from sweat and blood, from the soul
And...
From this album
What I hope is
It will spread into your heart
To help heal
To protect everyone from depression
To help everyone find success in something
To be happy
I hope that it will be good for everyone
Love yourself
Thank you!