Hey you, myspace user click here now to get
A brand new iPod, yes this offer is legit
It will come to you in a factory sealed box
And you say to yourself "wow this offer really rocks!"

But before you get your prize
There's some things to recognize
Just follow these easy steps and in the mail you'll find
A new iPod will be right in there and you can say "it's mine"

But first you gotta sign up for Ben Affleck's mailing list
And then look onto this website to find classmates that you missed
And then register to receive swimsuit catalogues and pay
No, not all these things are free but the iPod is, okay?
Then you gotta take this survey that tells when you're gonna die
And we'll give you a new pen pal, to his mail you must reply
And then download a free trial of the newest AOL
Oh and by the way, to take this offer, you must own a Dell

Now that you've clicked here and you see what you must do
You've considered closing out the window, saying you are through
But do not leave yet, no you can cancel anytime
But you gotta write an essay telling why, cause that's a crime

You can pick which things to do
But leave behind only two
Yeah not all of this stuff's free, but worth it when you get
Your new iPod and just think that you can thank the Internet
But then some things you sign up for require other stuff
Like you gotta rate these pictures of John Goodman in the buff
And then come to New York City for a great Easter egg hunt
And participate in this contest and do a crazy stunt
And then buy some Girl Scout cookies from that crazy kid next door
Then give us your girlfriend's phone number and your SAT score
Then after you have done all this stuff and when you think it ends
We will tell you that you have to refer seven of your friends

But we offer way more
Benefits, don't ignore
Free iPod's to die for
Just pay our sponsor

Now if you sign up for this
We assure you, there's no twist
Don't you wanna click on every banner ad you see
Doing so can make you win new stuff and the item's free

But now after your seven friends reply to your refer
There is one more thing you gotta pick, whichever you prefer
But this time each one costs something, but hey you'll be happy soon
Just as long as you complete this offer by this afternoon
You can either buy a gift card for yourself on Amazon
Or a first class ticket for a plane that's going to Taiwan
Or buy lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of shoes
Don't these offers look so good that you can just hardly refuse?
(Get an iPod, get an iPod)