Cathy Ang
Mattie’s Lament
[MATTIE]
Dear Mom and Dad
Things are fine here
And by fine I mean, well
I'm not shivved so that's something
Statistically so many people die each day
That that I'm not one of them's something to celebrate
It's the little things
The very little things
Things that seem so insignificant you might forget
Til those little things are the only things left
And you don't mope
Like there's no hope
Like the world's come crumbling down
You're one forced muscle twitch from turning up that frown

I have friends here
And by friends I mean convicts who murdered their families
And yet who I somehow trust more
Than I can these girls
Who called me their friend
Then threw me under a bus and left me for dead
But it's the little things
The very little things
It's those things you don't think would occur in your life
But some girl named Tasha just made me her wife
And you don't cry
Or just ask why
There's always something you can do
Even when you're stuck wondering
Why the fuck this would happen to you

[spoken]
Sorry Mom and Dad, prison has hardened me

[sung]
When I think about the way things were before
I don't think that I can do this anymore
I want to cry
I want to scream
I need to shout
I want to claw my way out
I want to claw my way back in time
I wouldn't ever cheer, I wouldn't try
I'd just join the chess club or ballet
And have a better definition of a bad day
I'm sorry I was reckless
I'm sorry I got drunk
I'm sorry about peer pressure
Peer pressure sucks
And I'm just like oh my god, I can't do this forever
The best thing I'll do in a year is knit a sweater
I don't think I'm cut out for doing time
I need a better lawyer
I need a better life
Can this really be how it's all gonna go
Cause I don't think I killed those girls
I really don't
[INMATE, spoken]
Shut the fuck up!

[MATTIE]
But it's the little things
The very little things
It's those things that should really mean nothing at all
But nothing in hell is a big freaking ball
So you say crap, I guess that's that
You build a bridge and you move on
And hope that four years doesn't feel very long