[Verse 1]
I always thought love was such a waste of time
But destiny took a turn on Hollywood and Vine
I shopped for some snacks up at the Trader Joe's
Cookie butter is crack, yeah, you already know

[Pre-Chorus 1]
And that's when I saw him, blonde hair and some bronze skin
6'3" of perfection, no Botox injections
The bod of a Viking that likes to go hiking
I bet he does runnin', he's my bloomin' onion

And in the most sexy, sultry Australian accent I've ever heard
He said, "Pardon me, miss"

[Chorus 1]
Chris Hemsworth thinks I'm a woman
I am so naturally his fantasy
Chris Hemsworth thinks I'm a woman
He dreams of me at night 'cause I'm his type, yeah
Stormy skies, beefy thighs
Take me to Asgard
Lightning strikes in his eyes
I'll be his woman tonight

[Verse 2]
The very next day on Sunset Boulevard
I finished a spin class that was really freaking hard
And when I walked out, I couldn't catch my breath
I fell to the ground in my own pool of sweat

[Pre-Chorus 2]
And you came to save me, hands soft as a baby
So willing and able, he was holding a bagel
He made me a sidekick, but he needs a side chick
I would change my last name, I could be his Endgame

And as he stood over me, casting a shadow of love across my bosom
He said, "Ma'am, are you okay?"

[Chorus 2]
Don Cheadle thinks I'm a woman
I am so naturally his fantasy
Don Cheadle thinks I'm a woman
He dreams of me at night 'cause I'm his type, yeah
Battle suit, ass to boot
He's my Avenger
He can't lose, he makes me swoon
I'll be his woman tonight

Little did I know, watching from the distance was the man of my dreams
He had piercing blue eyes, a lean frame, and brown locks of heavenly hair
He rushed over to me and he whispered
"Eh, took quite a tumble there, sweetheart"

[Chorus 3]
Steve Buscemi thinks I'm a woman
I am so naturally his fantasy
Steve Buscemi thinks I'm a woman
He dreams of me at night 'cause I'm his type, yeah
Fargo man with a plan
He makes my heart beat
Mr. Pink, he's my kink
I'll be his woman tonight