[Verse 1]

Alright, still goin' here. (Hah, hah)
We're still goin' here
I didn't mean to upload what I uploaded earlier, that was an accident
I'm trying to be lawful. I'm not trying to do anything bad (Okay, here goes, here it goes)
Yo, it's a book about my week-long stint in the CIA
A book about how I learned to live life my way
A book about the FBI and how they spied on me when I was in school
Of how I learned it's always better to break the rules
About flapping my penis at the cops
And about all my felony charges being dropped
A book about mooning neighbors as a kid
About rеalizing how much I miss it
About shattering a bulletproof-glass window with my fist
About the timе I swung at a security guard and missed
A book about this preacher's kid finding God through a bug
Through divine revelation without use of drugs
It's a book about how I committed arson as a child
How my temper's never been very mild
A book about killers
About substance
Not a book about fillers
It's a book about how all these things happened to me
It's a book about absurdy, surdity (Laughs)
Keep reading you will see
So, now that I mentioned all of those things up above
I proclaim with emphasis the purpose of this Love
This book is Love
Is life, laughter, life, laughter and Love
[Verse 2]

These are the words that I planned to say
In song, in verse on my inaugural day
After I chose to pursue a career behind Marshall Mathers
And took my first step up that proverbial ladder
14 platinum records later and after a stint in the White House
I was cleaning my cum off of Stefani Germanotta's blouse
These are the times that I manifested and saw
And they led to me breaking several statutes and laws
I never wanted anything so bad in the entire world
Just one shot at wooing that very special girl
And I know exactly why and how I did
It defies explanation, but that's just what magic is
Now I'm here with my Book and I've come to stay
To shine brightly into the night and never, ever fade away
To share my stories for the world to see
I, uhhhhhhh (Laughs) to scream out in defiance, "Life is beauty, beauty, beauty, beauty."

[Verse 3]

I pulled out of a tail dive and righted the ship
Four feet and two inches before I hit
Everyone loves an underdog they like to root for the runt
So you're god-damned right I'm still on this f**ing hunt
I choose to believe in myself
As opposed to my inner-voice's lies, for I and only I define myself
And I have learned to separate myself from my inner-voice in order to self-realize
And if I define myself and live under the guise of that definition
I become
I become
The One
I become the One
I become the One
And I'm talking about A-N-D-R-E-S-E-N, not Anderson (Uhn uhn)
I have learned that to define one's Self
One must become a Truth-speaker
I'm growing meeker and weaker
But I'm still pushing forward into a beaker of dog spooge
(Laughs)
I said "dog spooge"
(Laughs)
Ah, that was a good one, that was a good one