[Verse 1]
You are my best friend in the world
And I hope that you know
When we hang out together
It's freakin' awesome
Playing poker Friday nights
Beeramids and golf cart races
You think that my sister's hot
I accidentally shot your finger
Off your writing hand, oh well
You get disability
I broke my leg, you laughed so hard
And told the ambulance to stop at the bar

[Chorus]
You'll tell the world I'm gay
When you hear me say
That I really and truly feel this way
Not that there's anything wrong with being gay (Ooh-ooh-ooh)
And sometimes we punch each other in the face
Like when I hit on your mom and got to second base
I'm trying to say I love you in a heterosexual way

[Interlude]
(Woo!)
(Uh!)
(What?)
[Verse 2]
We fart and burp in the same key
And I think your iPod sucks
You make fun of my hair because yours is disappearing
I've seen your penis, you've seen mine
I popped your pimples, you rubbed
Aloe Vera on my sunburnt back
You went in fits when I shit my pants
You felt my girl's brand new boobs
You asked to suck 'em she refused
So while you slept, I shaved your head
You woke up and told me that I

[Chorus]
You'll tell the world I'm gay
When you hear me say
That I really and truly feel this way
Not that there's anything wrong with being gay (Ooh-ooh-ooh)
And sometimes we punch each other in the face
Like when I hit on your mom and got to second base
I'm trying to say I love you (I freakin' love you dude)
I'm trying to say I love you in a heterosexual way

[Interlude]
(Woo!)
(Uh!)
(Uh!)
[Bridge]
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na na
Na na na (Woah)

[Chorus]
You'll tell the world I'm gay
When you hear me say
That I really and truly feel this way
Not that there's anything wrong with being gay (Ooh-ooh-ooh)
And sometimes we punch each other in the face
Like when I hit on your mom and got to second base
I'm trying to say I love you in a heterosexual way

[Outro]
Na na na na (Woo!)
Na na na na (Uh!)
Na na na na (Woo!)
Na na na na (Uh!)
Na na na na (Woo!)
Na na na na (Uh!)
Na na na na (Woo!)
Na na na (Uh!)