[Verse 1]
I almost died the other day
Drove into the railing
Stared death into the face
And it said, "What it do baby?"
"You tryna die today?"
And I was like, "Maybe?"
And my cute little dog was on the passenger side
She jumped into my lap and started crying, oh no
She's like, "What the fuck do you think you're doing mama?" (Bitch, what the fuck?)
'Cause you're acting like a real female asian driver
Oh-oh oh-oh

[Chorus]
Female asian driver
That's me, a female asian driver, yeah yeah
That's me, a female asian driver, ooh yeah
That's me, oh-oh, yeah

[Verse 2]
Well, I guess that makes sense
'Cause I got titties and plus I'm asian
And I'm swervin' in and outta lanes like it's mayday
Bitch I'm crazy, don't you try me, damn
Think I might've killed a bunny
I'm so sorry little bunny
Should've hopped hopped hopped, hopped away
Hopped hopped hopped, out my way
I'm 5'2", and I'm really cute
Put everyone someone passes me
They're like, "Of course, she's asian"
What the fuck?
I've been staying in my lane
Haven't sped up in any way
But, anyway, yeah!
Now I got bruises all over my body
The seatbelt, it choked me
Now I look like I got a bunch of hiccies on my neck, damn
I'm a mess, yeah
I hope I don't have to get a new car
'Cause I can't afford that right now, yeah-eah-eah
And fuck my insurance company, ain't helpin' me
Please don't raise my premium, you bitch