(Chorus)
Some of these plants are burnt
But all of these plants are wet
You’ve done well darling you’ve worked hard
It’s been a struggle but now you are all set

(verse 1)
Rubber gloves what am I doing?
Melton Mowbray home of the pork pie
And now home to the demise of my bank holiday weekend
I could make a small fortune selling the crap on these scissors
I might need to have a number two on your loo
If that’s alright sister
I think that was a little more information than she needed
But I’m too pissed
And this is hardly a formal setting

(Chorus)
Some of these plants are burnt
But all of these plants are wet
You’ve done well darling you’ve worked hard
It’s been a struggle but now you are all set

(Verse 2)
The ride was nice
Country lanes comfort my bad brains
You can arsehole if you think I am doing this straight mate
I need some chisel
Don’t worry he tells me
It’s coming
As does doing me head in
He’s buying scissors and I’m buying beer
Four cans slip through my fingers and hit the floor
I’m pissed and I stink
It doesn’t look good
So I calmly place them back and get another 4
Le grand Stella
You look like Paul Weller
Fuck off
The search for the truth has actually resulted in me living a lie
I haven’t got a soul darling, my fingers are custard yellow and I never cry
(Chorus)
Some of these plants are burnt
But all of these plants are wet
You’ve done well darling you’ve worked hard
It’s been a struggle but now you are all set

(Verse 3)
She seems nice until she’s gets her phone out
Video phones are up there as one of the worst inventions ever
I don’t do bestiality babe put it away and go get me another stella please
We finish up around 6 o’clock
But there is still lots to do
I know the chisel is coming
So I volunteer to finish it off
Alright mate there’s you thing
You alright on your own
I’ve got to chip off
No problem
I’ve got four bags of smoke
A demo to listen to
A bit of that
Do what you want man
Yeah you Fuck off
At the end of a binge when you run out of everything
Your brain and your blood are draining
It’s only then you feel and think about the things that matter
The woman that you still love that will never come back to you
A silent scream down a greasy pole
Memories
Love and pain
Prehistoric insects
Crawling out of every hole
Bleeding noses
I wanna be, I wanna sound as good as the Stone Roses
My teeth feel like chalk
I don’t fancy the walk
So I’m kipping here
I’ll get to sleep eventually
Put a porno on
Shotgun a load of beer
(Chorus)
Some of these plants are burnt
But all of these plants are wet
You’ve done well darling you’ve worked hard
It’s been a struggle but now you are all set