[Intro]
Why are you such a stupid asshole?
Would you really like to know?
Well, pay your fee, remove your clothes
And Yvette will show you how
You went to school where you were taught
To fear and to obey, be cheerful, fit in
Or someone might think you're weird
Life can be perfect
People can be trusted
Someday I will fall in love
A nice quiet home of my very own
Free from all the pain
Happy and having fun all the time
It never happened, did it?

[Verse 1]
We got a drug
We're gonna try it out on you
Won't make you die
It'll getcha just a little bit sick

[Chorus]
Got a head cold
Got a chest cold
And it's three days old
Goin' on forever
Make you hazy
Make you lazy
Drive you crazy
For days and days and days and days and days
And years
[Verse 2]
Barely got the time now
To stay on the job
Double up the dosage in your water supply
Make you even sicker till you're slippin' away
Getting all depressed
It's getting all your friends
You can't get it up
For nothing that'll rock the boat

No!

[Refrain]
The government flu
The government flu
The government flu

[Verse 3]
Slip it abroad
Keep a-slowin' down the USSR
But meanwhile, we'll keep an eye
On what it's doin' to you

[Chorus]
Got a head cold
Got a chest cold
And it's three days old
Goin' on forever
Make you hazy
Make you lazy
Drive you crazy
For days and days and days and days and days
And days and days and days and days and days
And days and days and days and days and days
And years
[Outro]
The government flu
The government flu
The government
Flew through you