[spoken]
I kissed Polly good night as we stood at her front door
Now she's quite a proper lady, so I didn't ask for anything more
But I was feeling oh so groovy that I went down to the movie
And I sat down and guess just what I saw?

[Sung]
I saw Polly in a porny
Down at the dirty flicks
I saw Polly in a porny
I didn't know she knew them tricks
What I seen nearly struck me blind
I never knew she was theatrically inclined
I saw Polly in a porny with a pony and it nearly blowed my mind

Was she gallopin'? (no no no)
Oh was she trottin'? (no no no)
Oh was she riding across the country with some tall dark handsome person
Oh was she wearin' her cowboy hat? Well, not exactly that
But at least I recall she had her spurs on

I love ol' Polly in a porny
I keep on going back
In the very last row I'm singin' low with my coat bouncin' in my lap
I spend each dime I can afford
I swear she's gonna win an Academy Award
I saw Polly in a porny with a pony and the pony seemed a little bored
Ooh-ooh, (Polly in a porny!)
Ride, Polly, ride! (Polly in a porny!)
Slide, Polly, slide! (Polly in a porny)
Ooh, pass me that popcorn, Pepsi, Milk Duds...I only got one hand to hold 'em! (Polly in a pony)
Focus! Focus! Focus, you son-of-a-bitch!