[Spoken]
These are two songs which are not quite worked out yet. Number one, "The Jersey Plunk."
(sung)
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
When first I saw New Jersey
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
These are the thoughts I thunk
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
When Jersey looks like this to me
Either Jersey or me is drunk

By the time I reached Hohokus
With a banjo on my knee
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
My eyes began to focus
Plunk, plunk, plunk
And I knowed it wasn't me

Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
The Jersey men for instance
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
They all got rainbow tail
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
That's how you tell the Princeton
Plunk, plunk, plunk
From the Harvard and the Yale
When I met with one in Rahway
He said courtin' was sublime
Plunk, plunk, plunk, plunk
But his way wasn't mah way
Plunk, plunk, plunk
And I shot him just in time

[Spoken]
Number two, the barbershop quartet, "The Trouble with Women."
(sung)
I once loved a girl out in Flatbush
She was a picture of beauty and grace
But she thought kittens came from a cat bush
And she never had heard of first base
So I travel no longer to Flatbush
Though the girl is both wealthy and pure
For whenever I tried my desires to confide
Her mind was upon her coiffeur

Oh, the trouble, the trouble with women
They soften your heart 'til it melts
And then at the critical moment
They are thinking about something else