[Verse 1]
The wind was driving in my face
The smell of prickly pear
(My rival, show me my rival)
The milk truck eased into my space
Somebody screamed somewhere
I struck a match against the door
Of Anthony's Bar and Grill

[Chorus]
I was the whining stranger
A fool in love with time to kill

[Verse 2]
I've got detectives on his case
They filmed the whole charade
(My rival, show me my rival)
He's got a scar across his face
He wears a hearing aid

[Chorus]
Sure, he's a jolly roger
Until he answers for his crimes
Yes, I'll match him whim for whim now

[Instrumental Break]
[Verse 3]
I still recall when I first held
Your tiny hand in mine
(My rival, show me my rival)
I loved you more than I can tell
But now it's stomping time

[Chorus]
Sure he's a jolly roger
Until he answers for his crimes
Yes, I'll match him whim for whim now

[Instrumental Outro]